Must Be Blowfish

NASA intern guy #1: I think your fish are gay… Like, 99 percent sure. Look, they’ve got vertical bars.
NASA intern guy #2: They so want each other.
NASA intern guy #1: They do. And it’s not unrequited. Look, they both have vertical bars!

NASA Ames Research Center
Silicon Valley, California

Posted on April 20, 2020
Animals, California, Coworkers, Default, Sexuality

None Of Them Are Filtered

Teen gangsta wannabe yelling to small boy on playground: No, I wasn't, I don't smoke! He was just transferring the smoke to my mouth! (pause) Never mind! I'm not gay!

Park
Cincinnati, Ohio

Posted on March 27, 2020
Kids, Mouth, Ohio, Sexuality, Smoking, Teens, Thugs

You're Just Supposed to Be Having Sex Shamefully in Cars and Stairwells

Boy: Yo soy sexy.
Teacher, hyperventilating: You can't say you're sexy! You're only fifteen years old!

Spanish Class
El Paso, Texas

Posted on March 26, 2020
Age and ageing, Beauty, Bragging, Education, School [Elem., Middle, & High], Sexuality, Students, Teachers, Texas

Like God, If They Didn't Exist, TV Would Have to Invent Them

Young film intern asked to come up with new story: What about a girl surrounded by her sassy, lesbian friends? Do lesbians come in sassy?

Manhattan, New York

Overheard by: I honestly don't know

Posted on March 20, 2020
Employees, Movies, New York, Questions, Sexuality

This Season’s Most Unlikely Love Story

Girl, looking at video games: If I had a sword that pimp, I would just kill people all day and run around.
Boy following her: Girl, if you had a sword that pimp I would stop being gay and make you stop to make love to me.
Girl, looking appalled: I’d be busy killing people, though.
Boy, matter-of-factly: Well… I’d make you stop every thirteen kills.

Random Walmart
Boise, Idaho

Overheard by: Bunnee

Posted on March 1, 2020
Compare and contrast, Crimes, Friends, Games, Gays, Girls, Guys, Idaho, Murder, Sexuality, Stores, Weirdness, Wishes

The Slut Recordkeeping System Parallels Major League Baseball’s

Drunk girl, loudly, to her drunk friends: I mean, she’s slept with or semi-slept with more people than I have!

Clark and Broadway
Chicago, Illinois

Overheard by: flunk_punk

Posted on February 20, 2020
Compare and contrast, Creepsters, Default, Drunks, Friends, Girls, Illinois, Sexuality

Straight Love Is So 20th Century

Guy on cell: Oh, for fuck’s sake! Is it a lesbian wedding? … Is it a lesbian wedding? Then fuck it!

Seattle, Washington

Overheard by: Mephisto

Posted on February 14, 2020
Gripes, On the phone, Sexuality, Washington

You Must Be Gay, Then

Boy: So, do you have a boyfriend?
Cute, chubby girl, with suspicion: No…
Boy: Can I get your number?
Girl: No.
Boy: Why?
Girl: I'm gay.
Boy: Oh… Really?
Girl: No. Sorry. Creeper reflex.
Boy: So you wanna go out?
Girl: No.

Starbucks
Manhattan, New York