Professor: What did our founding fathers want? Who cares? They’re dead.
Oberlin, Ohio
Overheard by: Secret Spy
Professor: What did our founding fathers want? Who cares? They’re dead.
Oberlin, Ohio
Overheard by: Secret Spy
Lab TA, chatting during break: So I live alone, and I have a lot of trouble opening bottles. Have you guys ever heard of the plastic husband?
(entire class laughs)
Lab TA: No! I didn't mean it like that! I just meant I need help opening things up!
(class laughs again)
University of Pittsburgh
Pennsylvania
Professor at anatomy lecture to student touching her own throat: Ivanova, what are you gonna be touching when I'm lecturing on the sex organs?
http://anekdot.mail.ru/inner.html?rubric_id=2
Prof: Do you think that kicking a pregnant woman in the stomach was wrong?
Student: Ummmm… I’m not certain.
Prof: Do you think that what he did was a crime?
[Student pauses for nearly 30 seconds.]Student #2: Dude, he kicked a baby.
Seton Hall Law
Newark, New Jersey
Witty history teacher: So, kids, not only does the money look minty and refreshing, it tastes good, too!
Teen girl: Oh my god, really?!
US Mint
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Student: I’ve got some good news and some bad news.
Teacher: What’s the bad news? That you didn’t do your homework?
Student: No, that’s the good news. The bad news is that I love you.
Arcadia, California
Acting professor: Give me an action that would be the motivation for a police officer to ask somebody for their license and registration.
Student: … He wants her number?
Hartford, Connecticut
Overheard by: Claire
Professor: We’ll talk later in the semester about how suicide will be a better choice. Now, I don’t want anyone committing suicide before the first exam, but it would be less for me to grade, so go ahead.
http://www.overheardatumbc.com
Female student #1: You sure you want me to feed you this banana?
Female student #2: Get on with it, will you?
Female student #1: This thing's pretty big. I wouldn't want to choke you.
Female student #2: Don't worry about it. I've had much bigger.
Youngish professor: (raises eyebrows)
Female student #2: You think I'm kidding? I've had some pretty big ones. Think you can give me a bigger one?
Youngish professor (blushing): Um, possibly.
Female student #2: Well, I'd like to see that.
Female student #3: Um, are we still talking about bananas here?
Classroom
UCSC, California
