Male lecturer to friend: Well: in my defense, it wasn't my dildo.
Lancaster University
England
Male lecturer to friend: Well: in my defense, it wasn't my dildo.
Lancaster University
England
Little girl: The show will now begin. Please sit down and turn off your vibrators!
Barnes and Noble
Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Pretty sure she’s been to the theater before
Overexcited boy in cafe: Mum, mum, mum! Can I play with my new toy? Can I? Can I? Can I?
Disinterested mum: Sure.
Overexcited boy, holding toy: Look! I'm holding my winkle. And I'm peeing. I'm peeing all over the drinks. There's wee everywhere!
Disinterested mum: No, there isn't.
Kingston-Upon-Thames
England
Overheard by: Ben
20-something guy to friends: Yeah, I had a Teddy Ruxpin and I loved it but it made me feel sorta weird having it in my room and stuff, so I sold it on eBay. I regretted it instantly.
Atlanta, Georgia
(two lesbians taking items out of the shopping cart to place in their truck)
Butch lesbian (picking up a heavy box): Why do I always have to carry the heavy things just because I wear the dildo?
Wal-Mart
Dublin, Ohio
Overheard by: Octopus seeks sucker fish for good times and long walks
Guy: You guys should get her a vibrator for her birthday.
Girl #1: Or we could just find her a man…
Girl #2: Nah… I think buying a vibrator would be easier.
http://overheardinsydney.blogspot.com/
Woman #1, approaching register counter: Ooh! Kinder eggs! I love those things!
Woman #2: What are they?
Woman #1: They're chocolate! With something inside!
Cashier: They're hollow chocolate eggs.
Woman #1: With a surprise inside!
Woman #2: Ew!
Cashier: It's a toy.
Woman #2: Oh. A toy.
Cashier: Whoa, okay, just imagine you were a kid again, and what a surprise meant when you were a kid.
Woman #2: I know… I know. It's just, adult surprises are never fun.
Woman #1, walking out of store: What were you thinking it was going to be? A penis that would squirt all over you?
Woman #2: You never know! Adult surprises are always bad!
San Francisco, California
Mom to four-year-old's horrified babysitter: Poop is not play-doh. That's the lesson we learned today.
Plymouth Meeting, Pennsylvania
Older woman: My first computer was a Commodore 64!
Younger woman: A what? That sounds like a sex toy.
Western Michigan University
Kalamazoo, Michigan
