Mother to small boy: No, it's a courgette, dear. You can't light a fire with courgettes.
Sainsbury's Supermarket
Cardiff
Wales
Overheard by: Gordinho
Little boy running inside out of a rainstorm: I am a sword of wetness!
First United Methodist Church
Pittsburg, Kansas
Dude #1: You gotta go nucular on them!
Dude #2: It’s ‘nuclear,’ not ‘nucular.’
Dude #1: No, you can say either. It’s like the difference between saying ‘pancakes’ and ‘flapjacks.’ It means the same thing.
Dude #2: Ummm… No.
http://www.overheardinminneapolis.com/2007/06/gwb_is_not_an_acceptable_sourc.html
Overheard by: I say
Band instructor, about section: No, no, clarinets! It has to be short! Like pizzicato–pluck it, like a g string!
Band students: (attempting to contain laughter)
Instructor: Aww, c'mon, what the hell!
High School
Mattawan, Michigan
Guy on cell: Have you ever heard of swinging? (pause) Bestiality?
Richmond, Virginia
Overheard by: Us
Dentist, about to perform a root canal and three fillings: Wow, you have groovy teeth!
Glen Ellyn, Illinois
Overheard by: Claire
Girl: Oh god, I must really be drunk — I’m mixing my metaphors!
Bucknell University
Guy #1: Yo, it would be tight to work in a rug store.
Guy #2: Yeah, man. All those different kinds of rugs…
Oakland, California
Overheard by: archidork
Girl: Do you know who Helen Keller is?
Guy: No.
Girl: Well, she was blind, deaf, and something else…
Guy: Dumb?
Girl: No, she was quite intelligent actually, but I think she could smell.
Corvallis, Oregon
Mom to young son: Don't say “testicles” in public!
Mount Rushmore, South Dakota
Overheard by: Sarah