Australia

Suit lady #1: So how was your weekend?
Suit lady #2: Oh, it was really good. I went to a jail.
Suit lady #1: Really? I've never been to a jail.
Suit lady #2: Yeah, neither had I… it was really good.
Suit lady #1: I've always wanted to go to a jail.
Suit lady #2: Yeah, you probably will… I thought “Seeing as I'm putting people in there, I should probably find out what it's like.”

Sydney
Australia

Overheard by: Cassie Barlow

Girl on cell: Guess what? I got to be the big yellow cat again yesterday!

Hornsby train
Sydney
Australia

Grey-haired grandma to another: Of course, it was worse for him because she left to become a lesbian. (pause) And you can't help thinking of all that licking.

Norfolk Island

Overheard by: kk

Confused junkie: There were these two Jewish guys called Gold and Frankenstein, and they gave Jesus a mirror.

Box Hill Central
Melbourne
Australia

Girl, smelling another girl's hair: You're right! It does smell like a sweaty peach.

Australia

Girl #1, loudly in quiet library: And we thought we were going to the lecture on reasons to join the army, but we accidentally went to the wrong lecture theater, and it was a medical lecture on burns patients!
Studying girl: Shhhhh!
Girl #1, loudly: And this med guy who knew we weren't med students goes “This is a good lecture to come to! Lots of gory pictures!” and we were both thinking “Shit! Are these army people going to show us photos of people who have been blown up or something!?”
Studying boy and girl: Shhhhhhhh!
Girl #2: Can't be as bad as that lecture from first year. Remember the photo of the person's head who'd been run over by a train?
Girl #1, even more loudly: Yeah! And they showed us photos of a penis which had been bitten off!
(everyone in library, including studying boy and girl, burst out laughing)

Griffith University Library
Australia

Student, about assignment she's written: It's supposed to be (emphasizes with hands) that, that, then that, then that! But it's all blah blah blah blah! You know?
Friend: Is you introduction all dot, dot, dot at least?
Student: Yeah.

University of South Australia
Adelaide
Australia

Overheard by: fellow stressed out uni student

Guy on phone: Nah, nah, it's not cheating! I didn't ejaculate, so it's not cheating!

King's Cross
Australia

Overheard by: highly amused

Girl #1, about friend's makeup: This is definitely your color. Makes you look really classy.
Girl #2: Thanks!
Girl #1: Which is funny, because you're such a tramp.

Bus
Adelaide
Australia

Overheard by: plethora

Housewife: We all have days at home with the cat where we think, “God, that cat looks yummy.”

Newcastle
Australia

Overheard by: Susie