The Only True Currency in Any Nursing Home

Woman on cell: She'd look sharp if she had some teeth. She's just got to go get those teeth, though!

33 Bus
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

Overheard by: Alyson

Posted on April 1, 2022
Body parts, Bus, Compare and contrast, Default, Pennsylvania, Weirdness, Women

But Isn’t an All-Male Choir Kinda Gay?

Weird Asian guy: You’ve never heard about the clitoral frequency?! It’s a certain frequency that only men can hit, and if they hit it then all the women in the area will simultaneously orgasm.
Weird white guy: I’ve heard about the clitoral frequency! If you get an all-male choir to all sing as low as they can go, then they hit it.

Seattle, Washington

Overheard by: deb

Posted on March 29, 2022
Asians, Body parts, Dorks, Geeks & Nerds, Guys, Orgasm, Singing, Washington, Weirdness, Whiteys

Tonight's Movie: Bend It Like Bitchy

Girl wearing cleats: What would you do if I cleated you in the vagina?
Friend: Why would you do that?
Girl wearing cleats: No, really, like what if I cleated you right in the labia?

Baltimore, Maryland

Posted on March 9, 2022
Body parts, Default, Friends, Girls, Maryland, Questions, Vagina, Weirdness

Or Whatever This Is in My Eye

16-year-old: Mom, if you don't have herpes, why'd I find Valtrex in your purse?
Mother, seriously: I got Valtrex from the eye doctor for my yeast infection, Kim*.

Illinois

Posted on January 31, 2022
Body parts, Health & Hygiene, Illinois, Moms, Parenting, STDs, Teens

Going for Drinks After Work Can Be a Minefield

Girl #1: Get your hand out of your crotch!
Girl #2: It's not in my crotch!
Girl #1: Yeah, well it's in my way!
Girl #2: (laughs)
Girl #1: No, no, no, no! Wait! No!

Boston, Massachusetts

Posted on January 30, 2022
Body parts, Girls, Massachusetts, Weirdness, Words

Homie Also Has a Hard Time on Armed Forces Career Day

Flamboyant, very white math teacher: Alright, we have a test on Tuuuuseday, which is also, guess what, the blood drive! So don't donate blood before the test and please, please, do not donate blood during the test. You'll be writing with one arm and bleeding with the other, and then you'll get paler and paler… and keel over and die. Homie can't fly that. Homie can't.

Math Classroom
Hawaii

Posted on January 28, 2022
Body parts, Death & dying, Education, Hawaii, Health & Hygiene, Students, Teachers, Whiteys

Also, “Boner”

Nerdy philosophy professor: The word that comes to mind when I think about grading multiple-choice tests is 'bloodbath'.

Catholic University
Washington, DC

Overheard by: Ditto.

Posted on January 25, 2022
Bathing, Body parts, Colleges & Universities, Default, Dorks, Geeks & Nerds, Education, Teachers, Washington, DC, Words

I Promise Not to Look at Joan Rivers from Now On

20-something guy: Why are you so concerned about this?
20-something girl: No, seriously. It will split your corneas in half.
20-something guy: Wow, I hadn't thought about that.

St. Paul, Minnesota

Posted on January 24, 2022
Body parts, Default, Fears, Feelings, Girls, Guys, Minnesota, Questions, Weirdness

It Enchants All the Men Who See It

Teenage boy: I'm so ripped my back has a six pack! Six-pack back!

Portland, Oregon

Posted on January 20, 2022
Body parts, Oregon, Teens, Weirdness

Body parts