Body parts

Middle school guy #1: Dude, look at Raymond and tell me he doesn't look like my dad's girlfriend.
Middle school guy #2: What? No way!
Middle school guy #1: It's true. She looks just like Raymond, except she has a woman's body.

Coal Hill, Arkansas

(two girls exit bathroom stall together)
Girl #1: It was such a pleasure watching you. It was bliss.

Elbo Room Bar
San Francisco, California

Overheard by: crafty biotech

Teacher: I’m leaving for a few minutes. Ted*, you’re in charge.
Ted*: Alright, everyone get naked.

High School Classroom
Englewood, Colorado

Student: I’m as much like Hitler as Hitler was.

Ball State University
Muncie, Indiana

Overheard by: Kat

Chemistry lecturer: Is it just me, or are those people getting more and more naked up the back there?

Melbourne University
Australia

Old lady: I’ve lived with my body my whole life, but I don’t want it down around my ankles.

Women’s Gym
Studio City, California

Teenage to friends: My dad says it’s only gay if you make eye contact.

Lacomb, Oregon

Overheard by: lalenalynn

Little boy, to stoic mother in shoe aisle: I love the night life! I like the boobies! I love the night life! I like the boobies!
(five minutes later, at checkout lane)
Little boy, to stoic mother: I love the night life! I like the boobies! I love the night life! I like the boobies!…

Kohl’s
Chicago, Illinois

Overheard by: Me too, my man.

Guy: What are you showing me? Bruises on your knees? You can’t do that with every guy in the band you know.
Girl: I know. But that would be awesome if I could!

Carroll Community College
Maryland

Overheard by: Left Speechless

Frat boy #1: … And it just came out on her thigh. He didn’t even get it in. Just wound up on her thigh.
Frat boy #2, mumbling: Dude! I hate when that happens.
Frat boy #1: What?!
Frat boy #2: I said I ate some chicken.

University of Alabama, Alabama

Overheard by: CB