Clothes

Girl to group of friends: And then he lifted up his skirt to reveal a fake vagina!

Comic Con
San Diego, California

Male student in campus center: So once you put on the wetsuit, you pee all over yourself. Then you're warm for the whole time!

Princeton University
New Jersey

Overheard by: excuse me?

Guy #1: You walked back to your house naked last night?
Guy #2: Yeah, but I was wearing socks.

Arizona State University

Overheard by: Jayne

Scenester: I hate my life!
Random passer-by: You have cool socks, though.

Munich, Germany

Father to son in stroller: Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall; Humpty Dumpty had a great fall; Humpty Dumpty hired a great lawyer; Humpty Dumpty sued the pants of the wall maker.

K Street
Washington, DC

Girl in library #1: My intro and conclusion are really bad.
Girl in library #2: It's okay… an essay with a bad intro and conclusion is like a hot guy in dirty clothes.

Dalhousie University
Canadia

Girl who always rides skateboard: And so we were playing ping pong, and he took his shirt off!
Friend: Right.
Girl who always rides skateboard: And then he let me hit stuff against him!

Rangi Ruru Girls' School
New Zealand

Mother to three-year-old son: What are you doing? Come here, stop looking at the bras!
Son: (mumbles something unintelligible)
Mother: Yes, I know they're beautiful…but they're not for you!

Target
Delran, New Jersey

Overheard by: Amused Employee

Female shopper, surveying bathing suits: The crotch in this looks a little, uh…narrow. Tiny, actually. I feel like it doesn't provide full coverage.
Sales girl: I know. It's sort of the style now, though.
Female shopper: What do you mean, “style”? My labia showing?
Other shopper, walking up: Yeah, I agree. I don't want my vagina suddenly falling out at the beach.

American Apparel, Capitol Hill
Seattle, Washington

Overheard by: Celessa

Obnoxious teenage boy: No, that guy's really weird. I mean, did you hear what he did last year?
Friends: No.
Obnoxious teenage boy: He took a slice of cheese and two pieces of ham. Then he got a pair of socks and he put them in an aquarium…

Eugene, Oregon