Woman on cell: Take him home in a straitjacket, or take him to the psych ward in a straitjacket…either way, he's not going to be happy.
Saratoga, California
Overheard by: Coffee shoppe caffeine junky
Woman on cell: Take him home in a straitjacket, or take him to the psych ward in a straitjacket…either way, he's not going to be happy.
Saratoga, California
Overheard by: Coffee shoppe caffeine junky
Sober sorostitute with heavy smoker's voice: Like o-m-g, I just decided on my Halloween costume!
Drunk sorostitute, stamping feet: Oh my god! What?! What what what?
Sober sorostitute: Wait for it…wait for it… Little ho peep!
Drunk sorostitute: Can we have sex with the little ho sheep?
Duke University
Durham, North Carolina
Overheard by: Disgusted
Loud high school chick in back of the bus: Remember when Amanda was wearing that skirt and she farted? It sounded like she dropped a fucking bomb! Wheeee-boom! Everyone applauded, it was that fucking cool.
Alberta
Canadia
Overheard by: bitingontinfoil
Punk girl: For some reason, everything you do makes sense when you're in only your panties.
Purple-haired girl: I know, right? It makes sense to me too!
Tall greaser guy: In fact, it wouldn't make sense if you weren't only in your panties.
Bakersfield, California
Annoyingly talkative woman: I got my pumpkin t-shirt at Old Navy eight years ago. I wear it every year. But I've only worn it… eight times!
Commuter Train
Toronto
Canadia
Overheard by: M@
Woman to friend: Is she aware that we have three Talbots and a dog bakery?
Princeton University
New Jersey
Enthusiastic two-year-old boy: Mommy, my bottom just burped!
Illinois
Overheard by: martha
Sober teen: The mall is, like, all about clothes now.
Towson, Maryland
Overheard by: Sven Johnson
Small boy with ice cream cone, trying to get mom's attention: I peed my pants! I peed my pants! Mommy, listen to me, I peed my pants!
Mom, deadpan: I bet that's real uncomfortable for you.
Dad to son: When we get home we are just gonna have to hose you down.
Son to dad: Oh yeah, make me lay on the yard and then spray the hose on me, and on my penis, and down my pants on my penis!
Boy's brother, from minivan: Ew! You can spell the pee!
Bucks County, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: free birth control