Man walking down the street: All I did was stick my hand in her jacket and the show was over!
Madison and Canal
Chicago, Illinois
Teacher: Come, take a journey with me into *David’s pockets.
MDN High School
Tempe, Arizona
Overheard by: Jamie
Girl to friend: I swear to god, if there is semen on my shirt, I will kill everyone.
College Park, Maryland
Overheard by: Tom and Laura
High school chick #1: Omygod, I totally love him.
High school chick #2: Omygod, me too.
High school chick #1: I mean, he is like easily the hottest guy at our school.
High school chick #2: Oh totally. Like he is soooo cute.
[pause].
High school chick #2: What does he look like again?
High school chick #1: Um, like, I think he wears jeans a lot.
Lambton Quay
Wellington
New Zealand
College girl: Remember that girl who admitted to stealing my clothes from the laundry room?
Friend: Yeah?
College girl: Well, she finally gave me my clothes back at the end of the semester before she mysteriously disappeared. I was like going through them and I found not just my clothes, but like other people’s clothes too. Not just girls either. I found tighty-whities and shit. But the weirdest part was at the bottom of the basket. There was a plastic bag of jewelry ranging from like cheapo rhinestone shit to like semiprecious stones, a tv remote with no batteries, a crazy-straw, some masking tape, an empty lipstick tube thing, and a handful of Canadian money.
Newark, New Jersey
Teacher: Oh wow, I just noticed that I’m not wearing my wedding ring. I feel half naked… You guys are lucky that I’m not.
Ontario
Canadia
Girl: Dude! Satan is in the store! He’s trying on lingerie.
Victoria’s Secret
Bakersfield, California
Hippie woman on cell: I don’t care what you wear. Just wear something that you’re okay getting Jell-O on… Yes, J-E-L-L-O.
Syracuse, New York
Overheard by: paula-t
Pre-hipster eyeing Harvard t-shirt: What do you mean you can't afford it? But you graduated from there. Isn't that the whole point of going there?
Prudential Mall
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by:
Physics professor, talking about static electricity: So why does it work when I'm sliding in a car with carpet seats wearing my wool sweater and not work when I'm sliding in a car with leather seats in my leather outfit?
Students: (shocked silence)
Professor: I mean…I don't…ummmm, moving on…
University of Evansville
Evansville, Indiana
