That Rug Really Ties the Room Together

Girl student: So, the Federal Government is like, a puppy, like (giggle) they're so cute… And like, you want to just cuddle them, then they're naughty and it's bad.
Teacher: Kelly, could you please explain a bit more? I'm not getting your reasoning here.
Girl student: Well…they do good things, and it's cute, then they like pee on your rug, and it's bad.
Teacher: I promise you, the next time a member of the Federal Government pees on my rug, I will go bonkers.

Boulder, Colorado

Overheard by: Tizri

Posted on March 19, 2009
Animals, Beauty, Colorado, Compare and contrast, Default, Girls, Pee, Questions, Students, Teachers

Well Did I Say You Looked Good in It?

Aspenite to friend trying on jacket: I like white on you.
Friend: This is ivory.

Aspen, Colorado

Overheard by: GGary

Posted on March 18, 2009
Clothes, Colorado, Compliments, Default, Friends, Words

And Lip Rings Are Less Work Than Babies

Customer to cashier with lip rings: Okay, two questions. One, did that hurt?
Cashier: Um, not as much as I thought it would.
Customer: Second question, why did you do that?!
Cashier, speechless: Uhm…honestly…
Friend of customer: Ah, hell man, because she likes it. Shit!

Music Store
Denver, Colorado

Overheard by: I've got metal in my face too…

Posted on March 18, 2009
Colorado, Customers, Default, Employees, Fashion, Friends, Insults, Questions, Stores

Economics Really Is a Dismal Science

Professor just before class starts: There's no sporting events this weekend, right? We need something to bet on. (pause) I've got it! How about the hurricane?

CSU Classroom
Fort Collins, Colorado

Posted on March 5, 2009
Class, Colorado, Compare and contrast, Default, Questions, Teachers, Weather

Just-Kidding-napping Is Still Illegal

Marathon runner: Do you suppose that if I grab that kid and take off running, that his parents would pay more attention to him? But then again, what do I do? Drop him off and say “just kidding”?

Pearl Street
Boulder, Colorado

Posted on March 3, 2009
Colorado, Default, Family ties, Guys, Kids, Questions

It's So Difficult to Pick Up a String Quintet in Colorado

Shabby looking 50-something woman to herself as group of guys walk by: No, that's three guys, I need five.

Fort Collins, Colorado

Overheard by: fortunately one of only three

Posted on February 14, 2009
Colorado, Compare and contrast, Default, Weirdness, Women, Words

Thoughtful and Creepy, That's You

Suit: Well, no, I've never had an STD before…why, do you want to give me one?

Aurora, Colorado

Overheard by: wallflower

Posted on February 12, 2009
Colorado, Default, Questions, Sex, STDs, Suits

I've Got the List Whittled Down to Me, You, and Anderson Cooper

Punk dude: I have the ability to decide who deserves a soul.

Manitou Springs, Colorado

Overheard by: Nathan Brauner

Posted on February 9, 2009
Colorado, Default, Euphemisms, Gifts, Guys, Punks, Weirdness

The Main Problem Is the Language Barrier

Young man: I love living in Honolulu, but everything's so expensive. I can barely afford just to live. It's actually pretty common to buy milk for eight dollars a gallon!
20-something girl: Wow! Really? What's the exchange rate there?
Young man (looking rather baffled): It's about one to one.
20-something girl: Oh, well, that's not too bad.

Denver, Colorado

Overheard by: Brian

Posted on February 7, 2009
Colorado, Compare and contrast, Default, Feelings, Geography, Girls, Gripes, Guys, Language barrier, Money, Questions

While Black Eyeliner Is the New Jersey State Bird

Goth girl to friend: You have to know your ChapStick! ChapStick is the Colorado state bird!

Aurora, Colorado

Overheard by: Lee

Posted on January 12, 2009
Birds, Colorado, Default, Geography, Girls, Goths, Names