…And Then There's the Restrictitude of the Thong

Professor: So, first of all, there's the gigantitude of the bong…

North Central Michigan College

Overheard by: Maggie

Posted on August 6, 2018
Colleges & Universities, Default, Education, Michigan, Stupidity, Teachers, Words

Kids Raised on Sesame Street Often Have That Reaction

(bible thumper holding cross is passing out pamphlets on the street)
Hipster guy, yelling: Yeah! Lower case 't'!

Royal Oak, Michigan

Overheard by: Sara

Posted on August 3, 2018
Compare and contrast, Default, Guys, Hipsters, Michigan, Weirdness, Words

But I've Thought About That, Too

Girl: Cara is so cute.
Guy: Yeah, she's adorable.
Girl: I mean, if I were a lesbian, I'd have sex with her.
Guy: I'm a little creeped out by that.
Girl: I mean, I've thought about it… (slight pause) I've never weighed myself!

Boston, Massachusetts

Posted on July 31, 2018
Beauty, Bi-curious, Compare and contrast, Compliments, Default, Feelings, Girls, Guys, Massachusetts, Sexuality, Weirdness

Please Don’t Put Me Under Your Love-Handles and Carry Me Home

Young boy: I’m so hungry! Mom, I’m so hungry I could eat you! I’m so hungry I could eat a fat girl!
Mother: Don’t call people fat, that isn’t nice.
Young boy: I didn’t mean you.

Yavapai Regional Medical Center
Prescott, Arizona

Posted on July 31, 2018
Arizona, Default, Food, Gripes, Kids, Moms, Parenting

But I'm Currently Putting David Hasselhoff Through a Rigorous Mentorship Program

Elderly Italian lady to store clerk, while judging jugs of wine: I'm the last of the great drinkers.

Liquor Store
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

Overheard by: Steve

Posted on July 30, 2018
Compare and contrast, Default, Drinking & drunks, Foreigners, Old folks, Pennsylvania, Stores, Women, Words

I'm Definitely Calling Her Again.

20-something guy #1, in pub: So how'd it go?
20-something guy #2: How'd what go?
20-something guy #1: With that girl you pulled on Saturday?
20-something guy #2: Oh. Well at first it went well, went back to her place, she started sucking me off.
20-something guy #1: Nice.
20-something guy #2: Yeah. Until I passed out drunk and she got pissed off and bit my dick to wake me up.

Leamington Spa
England

Overheard by: Bleep

Posted on July 29, 2018
Default

Not in This Relationship

Girl running up stairs: I ran three miles yesterday!
Boy out of breath: I’m wearing pants.

Boyertown High School, Pennsylvania

Posted on July 28, 2018
Clothes, Default, Girls, Gripes, Guys, Health & Hygiene, Pennsylvania

Really Brought Down Property Values

Large black woman: They were the finest people on the block, but man, were their kids ugly!

Kohl's
Cherry Hill, New Jersey

Overheard by: Jyoshiki

Posted on July 25, 2018
Beauty, Black people, Compare and contrast, Compliments, Default, Kids, New Jersey, Women

What If His Whole Life Is a Bald-Faced Lie?

10-year-old girl: Actually I do like a boy… Justin Bieber.
Father: But Justin Bieber's gay.
10-year-old girl: No he's not.
Father: Yes he is, he's gay with Zac Efron.
10-year-old girl: Zac Efron's not gay, he has a beard!

Perth
Australia

Posted on July 22, 2018
Default

Does It Make My Breasts Look Phoney?

Teen girl: Hey! This lip gloss matches my nipples! And my phone.

Galleria Mall
Las Vegas, Nevada

Overheard by: Jo

Posted on July 19, 2018
Body parts, Cell phones, Compare and contrast, Default, Girls, Malls, Nevada, Nipples, Teens

Default