Guy friend: I'm super excited to have couscous and sausage for lunch.
Girl friend: Yeah, I'm always kinda down till I get some sausage in me.
Guy friend: Whoa!
Bangor, Maine
Overheard by: Sarita
Girl on cell: I was about to go home, so I told Bob* to get the cheese because I'd brought it over so George* coud make a cheesy bagel, right? So Bob* brings me the cheese but then he starts massaging my back, and I fall asleep with the cheese. I wake up like a half hour later and he's doing it to me, so I grab the cheese, say goodnight, and leave. And after that, whenever I saw someone eat a piece of that cheese I felt sooo weird. But now it's all eaten, the evidence is gone, and what that cheese witnessed will never be revealed.
Outside Westfield Mall
San Diego, California
Agriculture student #1: So she starts screaming and I just knew, so I said, “did you search for “hot dog” without using the safety search?”
Agriculture student #2: Oh, no, hot dog without a fig leaf?
Agriculture student #1: Yeah! And you know how she is, so she starts screaming and freaking out. But it wasn't even a human, it was a dog…
University of Florida
Gainesville, Florida
Drunk girl: I love the boners that sound like sandwiches! Boner on wheat, boner on rye… That's pretty much it.
Chicago, Illinois
Overheard by: Claire
Teen girl, holding candy bar: Why does it have to be so big? I can't take all this. (pause) That's what I said!
Harrisburg, Pennsylvania
Very annoyed guy eating breakfast: I love the smell of hatred in the morning.
Confused girl sitting next to him: Is it anything like coffee?
Very annoyed guy eating breakfast: What? No, it's nothing like coffee. God, you're so stupid.
College Dining Hall
Albuquerque, New Mexico
Drunk girl: We were around the bonfire eating flamin' hot Cheetos, and then his brother ran around with the gas can, naked.
Trailer Park
Central Texas
Overheard by: HaleyJ