Girls

Blonde: I don't ever want to be a baby thrower, but I can't wait to be a baby catcher!

Milwaukee, Wisconsin

Angry male: You don't have a couch! Where are the boyfriends and husbands supposed to think?
Tiny shop assistant #1: I really don't know.
Tiny shop assistant #2: Well, we don't have a couch. But we do have Skittles!
Angry male: That will suffice.

Supre Store
Australia

Teen boy to friends: Wait, how the hell did we start talking about the Swedish mafia?
Teen girl three tables away, leaping out of seat very excitedly: I want a Swedish muffin!

Cafeteria, Corona del Sol High School
Chandler, Arizona

Cute girl: This lotion is great! I actually have it on now, and keep smelling myself!
Teen boy, dragged in by his mother: Really? Can I smell you?
Cute girl: Sure! Smell me!
Teen boy: Wow, you do smell great! Mom, smell her!

Soap Store
New York City, New York

Short girl hugging friend: Let's make CocoRosie jokes and spoon.

Basketball Game
Chestnut Hill, Massachusetts

Overheard by: sounds pretty nice to me

Blonde bimbo: So what part of New York are you from?
Brunette: Manhattan.
Blonde bimbo: Like where is that in New York?

Maine

Girl #1: It's like putting a band-aid on when you need stitches.
Girl #2: Oh, thats a good one.
Girl #3: Yeah, and then the band-aid falls off and it gets infected.
Girl #1: And then you get gangrene and you leg falls off.
Girl #3: Only we could be trying to be supportive and morbid at the same time…

Belleville, Pennsylvania

Bathroom chick #1: So he had three piercings up there and two down there…
Bathroom chick #2: He said he had one that would get her off on her clit if they did it doggie style.
Bathroom chick #1: But what if her clit was pierced too? And his piercings on her clit?

Chilkoot Charlies
Anchorage, Alaska

Chick: I just don't want to sing about suckers with the step family!

Michigan

Overheard by: Meister E.

25-year-old man: Hey, Bella, I got you funyuns!
Five-year-old girl: Ewwww!
25-year-old man: Well, fuck you then.

Lake View Terrace, California

Overheard by: James Jameson