Translation: Sex With You Isn't Worth the Annoyance Of Your Company

Emo chick: So then she glared at me. In a mean way, not a happy way.
Normal looking boyfriend: I don't think that word means what you think it means.
Emo chick: Huh?
Normal looking boyfriend: You know, I just don't think this is going to work out.
Emo chick: Wait. You're breaking up with me? Here? Why?
Normal looking boyfriend: Well, I wasn't planning on it, but honey, you didn't like Watchmen and you've never read or seen The Princess Bride. Clearly we're just two very different people.

Flagstaff, Arizona

Overheard by: nayvera

Posted on September 30, 2020
Arizona, Books, Compare and contrast, Couples, Default, Girls, Guys, Happiness, Movies, Questions, Relationships, Words

When Good Conversations Go Bad

Academic-type Oxford guy: You have such silky hair.
American girl: Thanks…
Academic-type Oxford guy: You could weave a garment out of it!

Oxford
England

Overheard by: Catherine

Posted on September 30, 2020
Clothes, Colleges & Universities, Default, England, Girls, Guys, Hair, Offers and requests

Why Ball-Gags Exist.

Girl #1: You should get you some.
Girl #2: I don't think I could handle the stupidity. I ruined my fantasy by talking to him.

Bus
Vancouver
Canadia

Overheard by: always a problem

Posted on September 29, 2020
Bus, Canadia, Girls, Stupidity, Weirdness

You're the Worst Thesis Advisor Ever

Girl walking through campus: I can't believe you, I'm sitting in my living room in nothing but a towel, with mascara streaming down my face and you don't even care!

George Mason University
Fairfax, Virginia

Overheard by: You sit on a throne of lies

Posted on September 28, 2020
Clothes, Colleges & Universities, Default, Etiquette, Girls, Gripes, Students, Virginia

When Lifetime Television Becomes a How-To

Girl #1: I was watching tv last night, and this girl was prostituting herself to pay for med school…
Girl #2: That is such a good idea!

UC Berkeley, California

Posted on September 26, 2020
California, Colleges & Universities, Default, Education, Girls, Money, Technology

You Can Cry Afterwards and He Can't Tell

Girl: It's not “oh, I got laid underwater.” It's that I got to know the person and got close to them before I went underwater.

Psychology Class
University of Pennsylvania

Overheard by: Emily

Posted on September 24, 2020
Class, Colleges & Universities, Compare and contrast, Default, Feelings, Girls, Pennsylvania, Sex, Weirdness, Words

Besides, It's Been Done to Death

Girl: I'm not sure if I can be bothered dying.

London
England

Posted on September 18, 2020
Death & dying, England, Girls, Weirdness

Behind the Wheel, Sure

Girl (reading inspirational quote): “The best and most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen or even touched, they must be felt with the heart.” (pause) Helen Keller. (to friend) Wasn’t she, like, a killer?

Indigo Bookstore
Toronto
Canadia

Overheard by: Sunissa

Posted on September 17, 2020
Canadia, Default, Girls, History, Idiots, Names, Philosophy, Stores, Stupidity

Michigan Girls Make a Bid for the Title

Girl #1 in bathroom stall: My poop looks awesome! It has things in it! Come, look!
Girl #2 (waiting outside stall): No.
Girl #1: Come on!
Girl #2: No.
Girl #1: Please?
Girl #2: No! I never will.
Girl #1: I just won't flush it and then you'll have to look.
Girl #2: You better flush that shit!

Grand Rapids, Michigan

Posted on September 16, 2020
Default, Girls, Michigan, Offers and requests, Poop, Restroom, Weirdness

…Since I Accepted Homer Simpson As My Personal Savior

Teenage girl #1: He hates me.
Teenage girl #2: He doesn’t hate you. Maybe you should just say “hi” to him.
Teenage girl #1: How am I supposed to say “hi”? I have voices in my head saying “I want cheeseburgers”!

Canberra
Australia

Posted on September 15, 2020
Advice, Australia, Default, Feelings, Food, Friends, Girls, Teens