Serious guy: There is no… fucking… applesauce!
Dining Hall
UC, Santa Cruz
Overheard by: Willing to bet there's no regular applesauce either
Serious guy: There is no… fucking… applesauce!
Dining Hall
UC, Santa Cruz
Overheard by: Willing to bet there's no regular applesauce either
19-year-old girl #1: You know, I just a want a man I can sit naked with, watch Dead Poets Society, and then write a song about it afterwards.
19-year-old girl #2: Edward would totally do that for Bella.
19-year-old girl #3: You should leave Ryan.
19-year-old girl #2: Tell Ryan he can suck your dick.
Coffee Shop
Johannesburg
South Africa
Overheard by: Aeleron
Slightly obese lady on cell: Of course I'm at the gym, honey! I promised to go to the gym today, so I'm at the gym! (hangs up, talks to friend) What an idiot. I want some ice cream.
Ice Cream Shop
Missouri
Overheard by: jeeves
Hobo in track suit, shouting into cell: Why? Because she has no goddamn boundaries!
Boston, Massachusetts
Girl: Yeah, I work at Show Me's. It's like Hooters, only sluttier.
Albuquerque, New Mexico
Preppy girl #1: So, Emily's a total slut.
Preppy girl #2: I know, right?
Preppy guy: Wait, what's she like?
Preppy girl #1: Umm, like, a d.
Preppy girl #2: No, no, no: double d.
Preppy guy: I was talking about her personality, but thanks…
Starbucks
Manhattan, New York
Composition professor: So, by the way, this is how your do the top of the paper–title, dash, name, just like this paper here. I don't want a four-page paper which is three and a half pages long, with a half-page heading.
Student: But it's standard MLA citation practice for that heading to be like that.
Professor: Fuck MLA.
Hofstra University
Long Island, New York
Overheard by: I hate MLA
Emphatic woman: See? That's why this is your first marriage!
Sherman Oaks, California
Indignant little boy: Beethoven is not creepy!
Little girls, in unison: Yes he is!
Melrose, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Rose Fox
Flight attendant: And if you have smelly, I mean “small” children with you, you may disembark before other passengers. Thank you for flying Jetstar, we hope to see your ugly, I mean “lovely” faces again.
Jetstar Flight
Australia
