Massachusetts

Hobo in track suit, shouting into cell: Why? Because she has no goddamn boundaries!

Boston, Massachusetts

Angry girl to group of male friends: You can sleep with my mother, you can kill my father, you can burn down my house, but if you fuck with my bike…

Harvard University
Cambridge, Massachusetts

Overheard by: Veli Velo

Old Scottish professor in mid lecture: There happened to be something wrong with the quality of the product from the plant in Belgium, and the company response was: “well, of course you're getting sick, you live in Belgium. What a stupid place to live.”

Medford, Massachusetts

Ghetto girl on phone, angrily: Yeah, well, I bet he's just lollygagging somewhere with his grandma!

22 Bus
Boston, Massachusetts

Student in library: Could you forget that Jesus died for your sins for like five minutes?

Smith College
Northampton, Massachusetts

Large female tourist in plaid bermuda shorts: You know what's wrong with California? Too many windows!

Quincy Market
Boston, Massachusetts

Overheard by: Isotope Feeney

Son: I just feel so filthy after I go on the T. Can I please have some hand sanitizer, father?
Father: (silently hands it to son)
Son: Am I being paranoid?
Father: You're not being paranoid, Jonathan, you're being practical.

Boston, Massachusetts

Overheard by: Laura

College kid #1: You know what would be tight? If we got some of those plastic containers from Ikea.
College kid #2: Oh yeah, that shit's stackable, yo.

Subway
Boston, Massachusetts

TA: I fucked that little guy from my class again. But I left a drawer in my desk open. He found a Sudafed and I came.

Cambridge, Massachusetts

Asian kid: We don't do a lot of jumping around.
Black kid: Except in the wars, when Chuck Norris has lots of babies.
Asian kid: And white people are marrying everyone.

Babson College
Wellesley, Massachusetts

Overheard by: Bruce