Six-year-old #1: Did you know that we’ve kissed before and we’re not even family?
Six-year-old #2: Yeah, in a hot tub!
Casselman
Ontario
Canadia
Six-year-old #1: Did you know that we’ve kissed before and we’re not even family?
Six-year-old #2: Yeah, in a hot tub!
Casselman
Ontario
Canadia
Girl, about test: Um, I got number 34 right and it's marked wrong!
Rest of class: Yeah.
Professor: I know. I already gave you all credit. Just ignore that, it must be some leftover meth use from my college years.
Auburn, Alabama
High CVS employee: Yeah, we went to museums and shit. Took pictures with naked men… and naked women. I mean, that's what you do when you're in chorus.
Garwood, New Jersey
Tattooed guy: I once tried to smoke Aloe vera.
Taste of India
Minneapolis, Minnesota
Young dude: Man, my jaw hurts.
Chick: Must have been all that sucking last night.
Young dude: Gotta be from something. Plus, I don't remember anything, so…
Quakertown, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Ken
Older lady to friend over lunch: When I remember things, I remember them. But when I forget them, I forget them.
Vancouver
Canadia
Overheard by: Having breakfast nearby
Jolly literature professor: All of this talk of salacious babysitters and the indiscriminate disposing of corpses makes me feel like I’m back in Jersey again.
University of Mary Washington
Fredericksburg, Virginia
Wife to husband: There was something I was going to tell you, but it didn’t have anything to do with strap-ons or racism. Oh well, it’ll come to me.
Target
Murfreesboro, Tennessee
Chav, showing off in front of group of underage girls: Yes bruv, you don't even know, there was this duck, yeah, and I snapped its neck, innit! It was swimmin' around with its head loose making stupid noises!
Slightly older chav friend: Breds, you're talking shit, man. Number one, if you snapped a duck's neck it wouldn't still be swimming. B, I was there, remember, that fucking duck bit you on the hand, bruv and you screamed like a woman and ran away.
Cambridgeshire
England
Overheard by: Tim C
Professor: I went to college in Montreal, and one day I woke up on, like, the 16th floor of some high rise building with this beautiful Arabian girl next to me, and I didn’t know where I was or what was happening. It was great.
Student: And then you woke up again from your dream.
Professor: Well, then she ruined the next six months of my life. I don’t know why I told you this story.
Hartford, Connecticut
