Girl on phone: I mean, do you know how strange it feels to climb out of the bed of the guy you just hooked up with and then climb into bed with your brother?
Chinatown bus from New York City to Baltimore, Maryland
Girl on phone: I mean, do you know how strange it feels to climb out of the bed of the guy you just hooked up with and then climb into bed with your brother?
Chinatown bus from New York City to Baltimore, Maryland
Important looking man on cell: So, apparently, Georgia is being occupied by Russia. What this means to us is… Oooh! Toothbrushes!
Washington, DC
Overheard by: ak
Loud guy on cell: Where you at? Did you make the stop? He went to jail yesterday? What? What time did you get locked up? Damn!
McDonald’s, Illinois Center
Chicago, Illinois
Guy on cell: Yeah, I get scared when you turn out the lights. (pause) That's not gay. (pause) It's not gay when “turning out the lights” means putting your hands over my eyes while we're test-driving a car that's worth more than your sister's gold plated vahjay!
George Mason University
Virginia
Overheard by: Your sister won
Chick on cell: Yeah, mom, listen: I'm trying to buy some weed. Yeah, I'll call you back if I get any. Okay, love you too. Bye.
Downtown Crossing
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Adrienne
Black lady on cell: I said, ‘Yeah, I’m black, but dat don’ mean I be makin’ counterfeit money!’
Food Lion
Sanford, North Carolina
Overheard by: Elizabeth
Girl on cell: No, Mom, you don’t understand! The sex toy party was a lot of fun! They just had some great stuff there, okay?
College bus
Allendale, Michigan
Girl on cell: 'cause I kinda cut off my balls…
Boston Common
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: she didn't look trannyish
Man on cell: What? You calling me fat pussy? I will punch you in the face!
Boston, Massachusetts
Smokin' hot gay guy on phone: I bought the table under the impression that it was fuck-proof. My husband challenged me last night to prove otherwise. Now my table has been fucked through and Mark* isn't talking to me right now. (pause) Yeah, it does sound like a funny problem to have, but it's really not.
Manhattan, New York
Overheard by: The Sauce