Girl: We need to go steal more diapers from Target.
Texas Christian University
Fort Worth, Texas
Archive for the ‘Parenting’ Category
Guess Which One’s the Good Cop?
Six-year-old girl: Dad, I want to see snow!
Six-year-old girl’s twin: Me toooo!
Dad: But girls, it doesn’t snow down here – you have to go up north for that.
Six-year-old girl: Then let’s go up north!
Six-year-old girl’s twin: To the North Pole!
Dad: Yeah! But you know what, mom won’t let us.
Baton Rouge, Louisiana
Tell Anyone, And I’ll Burn You With This Acid Exfoliant
Guy #1: What is that?
Guy #2, holding sunscreen: Oh, it’s sport sunscreen. My mom made bring it.
Guy #3: Dude. Why do you have so many ointments?
Guy #2: The back of my legs get burnt.
Guy #1: You moisturize?
Canada’s Wonderland
Vaughan, Ontario
Canadia
Overheard by: Shan
Stop It, Lady, You’re Making the Scientologists Look Right
Mom to five-year-old son who is standing quietly: Settle down before I have to give you another pill!
Line for a theme park ride
Florida
Overheard by: Kim
Her Idol Is Martha Stewart
Dad, seeing his little girl spit in a soda bottle: This is disgusting, nobody will want to drink from it now.
Little girl: I know, that’s why I did it.
Dad: That’s not nice. Smart, but not nice.
Pumpkin Farm
Half Moon Bay, California
So I’m Just Going to Assume It’s Jesse Jackson
Lady #1: … And I don’t even know who the daddy is!
Lady #2: That’s hilarious!
B. Dalton — College Square Mall
Cedar Falls, Iowa
Overheard by: Darcy
And It’s Not So Much “Pick Up” As “Break Out”
Little girl pointing to City Hall: That’s where we pick up daddy!
Mom: No, it’s across the street at the jail.
http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/387165179/its-a-valuable-lesson.html
Overheard by: not good
No Ice Cream for Anybody
Mom: We can’t have ice cream. You just had candy at the movie.
Little girl: Mom, you are such a gutter-skank.
Mom, flabbergasted: What did you say?! What did you call me?! Where did you hear that term?!
Little girl: Dad.
Capitol Street
Sacramento, California
Overheard by: Total Gutterskank
A Confusion Often Found in Young Big Bad Wolves
Mom: Can you sit there and be mommy’s good boy just a little longer? We’re almost done shopping.
Boy: No. I’m not your good boy. I’m not your good boy anymore.
Mom: Oh you aren’t? Then will you be a big boy for me?
Boy: No, I’m not your big boy! I’m not your big boy, and I’m not your good boy anymore.
Mom: Oh really, then what are you?
Boy: I’m a grandma!
http://overheardinpdx.blogspot.com/2008/08/read-too-much-shirley-maclaine.html
Overheard by: kari
I’m Beginning to Regret Taking You to Therapy.
Little girl trying on boots: Mom, can I get them?
Mom: Yes, but you have to take them off.
Little girl: Will you help me?
Mom: No, if you don’t know how to take your own shoes off by now, I’ve done something very wrong.
Little girl, in low voice, taking boots off: …you have.
Target
Bellingham, Washington
Overheard by: Rachel
