Later the Cafeteria Staff Served Us Pasta Boobies

Random freshman: And then this junior girl came up to me and was like, “look at this penis on my locker…his name is Napoleon.”

Lakeland Regional High School
Wanaque, New Jersey

Overheard by: kristina

Posted on October 28, 2008
Default, Guys, History, Names, New Jersey, Penis, School [Elem., Middle, & High], Students

I Believe It's Pronounced “Ho”

Tiny girl to friend: You're not fat, you're Santa Claus-esque. Get it right, whore.

Coronado Middle School
Coronado, California

Overheard by: they won the game

Posted on October 21, 2008
California, Compare and contrast, Default, Diet & weight, Friends, Girls, Insults, Kids, Santa Claus, School [Elem., Middle, & High], Words

The One It Was So Easy It Was a Piece Of?

Guy to girlfriend: And after that, I was just done. It took the icing on the cake…or whatever.
Girlfriend: What cake?

Aloha Highschool
Oregon

Posted on October 10, 2008
Couples, Default, Food, Girls, Guys, Oregon, Questions, School [Elem., Middle, & High]

As Friends

White guy: So, is it true that when you die you go to heaven and get forty virgins to do whatever with?
Muslim guy: No, that's wrong. It's heaven: you get as many virgins as you want.

Liberty High School
Colorado Springs, Colorado

Posted on October 7, 2008
Colorado, Compare and contrast, Guys, Questions, Religion, Religious fanatics, School [Elem., Middle, & High], Sexuality, Whiteys

Where an Ancient Tribe Had Scrawled Its Secrets on the Stall Wall

Teacher: You know, when I was your age we didn't have classes like this. If you wanted to learn about personal finance, you got a job. If you wanted to learn about sex, you went to the bathroom.

Rock Bridge High School
Columbia, Missouri

Posted on October 5, 2008
Advice, Age and ageing, Default, Education, Masturbation, Memory lane, Missouri, Money, School [Elem., Middle, & High], Sexuality, Teachers

We Give Honey, I Shrunk Liberace! Two Thumbs Up

Middle schooler: There's a gay singer in my bra! There's a gay singer in my bra!

Muirlands Middle
La Jolla, California

Posted on October 2, 2008
California, Clothes, Default, Gender issues, Girls, Music, School [Elem., Middle, & High], Sexuality, Students, Tweens, Weirdness

…Until I Heard Her Reciting Beowulf in the Shower

English teacher: Yeah, I dated this girl one time and she took a class and learned middle English. She memorized the beginning of The Canterbury Tales in middle English so she was like, “Do you want to hear The Canterbury Tales in middle English?” And I was like “yeah!” and she said it, and it didn't even sound like English. It was crazy, like chanting or something. I was about to propose to her just then. But I got over it.