But It Came with the ESP Feature

Teen guy #1: Fuck, my girlfriend hasn't texted me back in over two hours!
Teen guy #2: Do you even have your phone on you?
Teen guy #1: No, it's in the car.

Upper Hutt
New Zealand

Overheard by: Schmitty

Posted on April 30, 2009
Default, Gripes, Guys, New Zealand, Questions, Relationships, Teens, Texting

…Like It Says in Our Biology Textbook?

Teen girl, looking confused: Wait, guys. (pause) Do black people see in different colors?

Bus
Seattle, Washington

Posted on April 28, 2009
Bus, Default, Girls, Offers and requests, Questions, Race, Stupidity, Teens, Washington

…That I Dipped in Cat-Food.

Teen girl #1 to friend: Ew, your breath smells like fish!
Teen girl #2: It's 'cause of the Swedish fish.

Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

Posted on April 28, 2009
Animals, Compare and contrast, Default, Geography, Girls, Pennsylvania, Teens

One With Special Training in Fashion Emergency Medicine

Teen girl in stall #1, reading: “Press for assistance…” Oh, Crystal, they have a press for assistance button in here!
Teen girl in stall #2: What?
Teen girl in stall #1: You know when you're in the hospital and you got that little button to press for when you need the nurse to come? They have one in here!
Teen girl in stall #2: Shut up!

Dressing Room
Dallas, Texas

Overheard by: Alicia K.

Posted on April 21, 2009
Compare and contrast, Default, Girls, Offers and requests, Questions, Teens, Texas

The Male Equivalent Of a Douche Chill?

Teen girl, yelling at computer screen: Oh, you willy shiver!

Totara Park
New Zealand

Overheard by: Schmitty

Posted on April 20, 2009
Default, Girls, New Zealand, Technology, Teens, Weirdness, Words

…Unless You're Mrs. Claus.

Teenager #1: There's no way for Santa to visit all the houses on earth; that's impossible.
Teenager #2: He doesn't have to visit every house, though. Not everybody celebrates Christmas.
Teenager #1: So? That would be like god saying “Muslims can go fuck themselves, I only watch out for Christians.”
Teenager #3: Some people actually do believe that.
Teenager #2: Yeah, I mean, if they don't celebrate Christmas, then…
Teenager #1: You know, at the speed Santa would need to travel to deliver gifts to all those people, his sleigh would literally catch on fire.
Teenager #2: Dude, see, it works like this…
Teenager #1: No, here's how it works: there's no fucking Santa.

Chino, California

Posted on April 19, 2009
California, Christianity, Default, Gifts, God, Santa Claus, Teens

Pepperidge Farm's Goyfish Snack Socks Kinda Missed the Boat

Obnoxious teenage boy: No, that guy's really weird. I mean, did you hear what he did last year?
Friends: No.
Obnoxious teenage boy: He took a slice of cheese and two pieces of ham. Then he got a pair of socks and he put them in an aquarium…

Eugene, Oregon