Now I Only Eat It

Dude #1: So, when the hell did you start smoking cigarettes?
Dude #2: Last week.
Dude #1: Why the hell did you do that?
Dude #2: I wanna stop smoking pot.

University of Miami
Miami, Florida

Overheard by: Stosh

Posted on June 27, 2023
Colleges & Universities, Comebacks, Default, Druggies, Drugs, Florida, Guys, Questions, Smoking, Time Management

With This Little Thing?

30-something male student to teacher: I keep having sex with these girls, and I go for 30 minutes… or sometimes and hour. They don't come. What's wrong with me? What's wrong with them?
Female professor, confidently: It sounds like you're rubbing 'em raw!

Community College
Tulsa, Oklahoma

Posted on June 2, 2023
Colleges & Universities, Oklahoma, Orgasm, Questions, Sex, Students, Teachers, Time Management

That Early-Morning Orgy Totally Messed with My Schedule

Underage girl, at 6 pm: Man, I knew I should've started drinking at 2!

Glengarry Highland Games
Canadia

Overheard by: is it that boring?

Posted on February 20, 2023
Canadia, Drinking & drunks, Teens, Time Management

She Just Goes There to Have Sex in the Steam Room.

Preppy girl: I woke up this morning and my legs were so sore! And then I couldn't remember why they were hurting! I was so worried, especially since I went out last night and Wednesday nights are usually when I stay in. And I couldn't remember anything that happened. But then I thought, “Oh, wait, I went to the gym yesterday. That must be it.”

Lawrence Hall, Colgate University
Hamilton, New York

Posted on December 7, 2022
Body parts, Colleges & Universities, Default, Girls, Maladies, New York, Preppies, Time Management

But I Thought I Was Your Main Squeeze?

20-something daughter: Mom, can you hand me the scissors?
Mom: Not right now, I'm doing Kegels.

http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/390186840/thats-not-safe.html

Overheard by: tara

Posted on November 5, 2022
Default, Girls, Kids, Moms, Offers and requests, Overheard in Minneapolis, Questions, Time Management

…As My Grandma Knitted on a Little Pillow.

Girl: First, string cheese. Then masturbation!

Saint Peter's College
New Jersey

Posted on August 26, 2022
Colleges & Universities, Food, Girls, Masturbation, New Jersey, Time Management

What?? It's Not Like I Told Them About Your Giant, Hammy Thighs.

Little girl in next stall: But what if Old Faithful starts going while we're not out there?
Girl's mother: Well, you'll have to pee really quickly so mommy can pee and then we can go.
Little girl: But you take a long time to pee.
Mother: Yes, I know.
(pause)
Little girl: You take a long time to pee.
Mother: Well, thank you for announcing that to the entire bathroom.

Restroom, Old Faithful Inn
Yellowstone National Park, Wyoming

Posted on July 17, 2022
Kids, Moms, Parenting, Pee, Restroom, Should have used a condom, Time Management, Wyoming

Just Killing Time Before the Dance Party in the Romance Languages Section

Brunette: So, are you gonna get some studying done?
Blonde: No, not really…
Brunette: So, you're here just to kill time?
Blonde: Yeah, to play.

Baillieu Library
University of Melbourne
Australia

Posted on May 28, 2022
Australia, Colleges & Universities, Education, Girls, Time Management

Now Kindly Fasten Your Seat Belts in Case the Doors Fly Off

Stewardess: Sorry for the delay, ladies and gentlemen. The first two planes we tried didn't work, so this is the third one and we made it here okay…so, so far, so good!

Airport Runway
Cabo San Lucas
Mexico

Posted on March 20, 2022
Airports & flights, Default, Flight attendants, North America, Public transportation, Time Management, Weirdness

What If We Have Tea and Just Look Out the Window?

Girl on phone: Come on! Join me for a cup of coffee. We’ll finish studying and then we’ll jump out of the window!

University of Trieste
Italy

Overheard by: MissKinney

Posted on October 14, 2021
Italy, On the phone, Time Management

Time Management