Washington

Guy #1: I was supposed to interview my grandma for my sociology project, but I didn't. I'm going to have to like, make up her life right now.
Guy #2: Why didn't you interview her?
Guy #1: Well, she lives in Oregon, and you know, the time change…
Guy #2: Dude, there's no time change from here to Oregon.
Guy #1: I know that, shut up! I'm trying to make myself feel better.

University of Washington
Seattle, Washington

Overheard by: Beatrice

Boi lesbian talking to shorter boi lesbian: Those motherfuckers are sweet as shit. Those bitches make me sick.

Tacoma, Washington

Overheard by: Maybe she likes them to be mean?

Girl walking with two guys: I’m going to teabag you! …I’m so glad I know what that means now!

WSU
Pullman, Washington

Overheard by: Rachel

Mother in bathroom stall to small child: We can go soon, but first mommy has to go potty, then put her pants back on. Put her pants back on… That's the most important thing.

Puyallup, Washington

Overheard by: in the next stall…

Daughter: You sure are being stupid today.
Mom: Duh, I have bird poo in my hair.

Seattle, Washington

Mother: Where's Germany?
Daughter: There. (points it out on map)
Mother: That's not Germany! That's Germany! (points to Africa)
Daughter: What? Mom, that's Africa. (points to Germany again) This is Germany. And this is Europe…
Mom: Oh.
Daughter: Holy shit, mom.
Mom: Don't judge me!

Renton, Washington

Girl, after looking at friend’s credit card: Wait, I always thought Orville* was your fake name.
Friend: Oh, honey, I have plenty of fake names, but ‘Orville’ is real. My family calls me J.R., though, because I’m the junior.
Girl: Oh! So Orville is your dad’s nickname, too? That’s weird!

Starbucks
Seattle, Washington

Tween: Should I get Fanta or cock?

Perth, Washington

Overheard by: shocked older sister.

Loud 20-something girl on cell: What do you mean you made out with my uncle?!

Spokane, Washington

Older man: Let's go to that bikini coffee shop!
Younger woman: What? What?
Older man: It's a coffee shop where women with self esteem issues wear bikinis and serve… coffee. What's not to get?
Younger woman: Fuck you.

Seattle, Washington