Isn't Saying “We're Texas Lutherans” Sufficient?

Professor: Everyone who thinks it's this answer jump up and say, “I'm brilliant!”
(nobody moves)
Professor: Everyone who thinks it's this answer jump up and say, “I'm not so brilliant, yet.”
(nobody moves)
Professor: Everyone else jump up and say, “I'm inhibited!”

Organic Chemistry Class
Texas Lutheran University

Overheard by: Kimberly

Posted on August 10, 2020
Class, Offers and requests, Teachers, Texas, Weirdness

Wolf Titties Are Hot This Year

Guy: It's not like he has one extra nipple… He has two.
Girl: He's like a rat!

Starbucks
Hollywood, California

Posted on August 3, 2020
Animals, California, Compare and contrast, Default, Girls, Guys, Health & Hygiene, Nipples, Restaurants, Weirdness

…Ahem, “Sylbs”

Female college student: Yeah, I tod did that too!
Guy college student: Did you just say “tod” instead of “totally”?
Female college student: Yeah, I never say any words that are more than two syllables!

College
Ontario
Canadia

Overheard by: Cat

Posted on July 28, 2020
Canadia, Colleges & Universities, Students, Weirdness, Words

All Those Slip-and-Fall Accidents Are Smitings

Religion teacher to class of girls: And remember girls, always wear a bikini in the shower, because god is always watching you.

Dublin
Ireland

Posted on July 26, 2020
Advice, Bathing, Clothes, God, Ireland, Students, Teachers, Weirdness

Translation: I’m Still a Little Stoned

Girl, frantically looking through fridge: Shit, I’m gonna be late for work… What the hell? Why is your rice in my freezer?
Boyfriend: Because then it will be happy and prosperous.

Washington, DC

Overheard by: Nic

Posted on July 24, 2020
Couples, Food, Girls, Gripes, Guys, Happiness, Questions, Washington, DC, Weirdness

And, in Our Lab Session, We'll Demonstrate It.

Professor: And tomorrow, we'll talk about the suck knob.

University of Hartford
Connecticut

Posted on July 20, 2020
Colleges & Universities, Connecticut, Education, Sensory experiences, Teachers, Weirdness

Drugging Miss Daisy

Old white lady, leaving table with a flourish: Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to the bathroom to shoot up.

Lemongrass
Baltimore, Maryland

Overheard by: Loves Her Some Thai Food

Posted on July 14, 2020
Age and ageing, Compare and contrast, Drugs, Etiquette, Ladies who lunch, Maryland, Restaurants, Weirdness, Wishes, Words

After I Spent All That Time Photoshopping That Dick Into a Pacifier

Freshman girl: Well, like, this was from like 2 am the day it was due. I mean, the first one I submitted was of me with a pacifier in my mouth, and they told me it was inappropriate at the last minute. I mean, like, why couldn't they have told me that in January when I submitted it?

University
Connecticut

Overheard by: You really needed to be told?