Middle-aged creepster: She was a slut in middle school, so she’s my type of girl.
Gentle Bens Brewery
Tucson, Arizona
Overheard by: a middle school slut
Middle-aged creepster: She was a slut in middle school, so she’s my type of girl.
Gentle Bens Brewery
Tucson, Arizona
Overheard by: a middle school slut
Spaced-out kid: And I think it was some kind of message in that out-of-body experience. Like, it was my soul trying to tell me that after I finished puking, I should take a shower.
Teenage queer: Your dreams are fucked.
St. Andrew’s College
Aurora
Canadia
Woman with four kids in front of a bondage window display: See that? That’s what I want to do to your dad, get him all tied up and just whip the shit out of him!
The Crypt
Denver, Colorado
Guy: You know, I’m usually anti-slavery… Except when I drink, then I’m all for it.
Bar
Milwaukee, Wisconsin
Guy to friends: No, I mean he’s really in love with her, like reeeeally in love. He left his trailer, and moved in with his parents.
Buffalo Wild Wings
Winchester, Virginia
Female suit: Wow, it smells really bad in here… like old period. Yeah! That’s it, old period.
Bridie O’Reillys
Melbourne
Australia
Police officer to college girls: It turns out there was a midget in the closet.
Downtown Palo Alto, California
Soccer mom #1: Is Cindy* coming?
Soccer mom #2: No, she broke up with Steve* today.
Soccer mom #1: She broke up with Steve*? Why?
Soccer mom #2: She called him and told him she wanted to play mixed doubles tennis, and he just lost it.
LA Fitness Locker Room
Buford, Georgia
Overheard by: trying not to laugh
