Linda: Ugh, this class is so depressing!
Professor: Let’s all take ten seconds to think about baby lambs to make Linda feel happy. [pause] Okay, back to Terri Schiavo!
Marist College
Poughkeepsie, New York
Linda: Ugh, this class is so depressing!
Professor: Let’s all take ten seconds to think about baby lambs to make Linda feel happy. [pause] Okay, back to Terri Schiavo!
Marist College
Poughkeepsie, New York
Professor: And this means that… [Looks at two students in the second row wearing striped shirts.] I just noticed that you two are matching! Wow! Anyway, this means that… [Sees another student farther back.] You too! [Stands back, eyes class suspiciously.] That’s almost too much of a coincidence.
Carleton University
Ottawa
Canadia
Female grad student on cell: Yeah, but what would be the societal benefit of having a bunch of dinosaurs running around?
SUNY Stony Brook
New York
Dude to friend: Don’t worry — I have plenty of meals left to buy condoms.
Cafeteria, University of Michigan
Michigan
Professor: Now, I want you to listen to what McCormack does with this last phrase. And then I want you to go slit your wrists. Because I know I do every time I hear this.
Peabody Conservatory
Baltimore, Maryland
Overheard by: Emo has nothing on opera
Political science professor to class, explaining the term “political actors”: Political actors can be political parties, politicians, organizations of different kinds…and by organizations I do not think of a group of pedophile carpenters gathering in a living room.
NTNU University
Norway
Overheard by: Amused student
Professor: I think fish are not animals. I don't have a concrete answer, but I think they are not animals.
Michigan State University
Overheard by: sjshock
Library worker girl: That's a cute bag.
Library worker girl with clear purse: Thanks!
Boss man: But then everyone can see everything you have!
Library worker girl with clear purse: It's not like I got a gun or anything… I can always hide things between the books…
Library worker girl: Like your gun?
Kent State University Library
Kent, Ohio
Economics professor, suddenly, in a creepy voice: Noooo you may not! Aquaman, you cannot marry a woman without gills! [Continuing in normal voice.] No? Anybody? No? Shame on you all! Just wait a few more years and you’ll get what I’m talking about and you will be so pleased.
Tufts University
Massachusetts
Overheard by: Adrian
Guy #1: I'm going to study all night!
Guy #2: Yeah, I'll come too.
Guy #1: No, man… You're too weak.
Wayne State University
Detroit, Michigan
