Woman loading mini van outside K-Mart: I hate mini vans, the only people that need mini vans are old people, white people, crackheads, and people who need 'em.
Chicago, Illinois
Overheard by: Rebecca
Woman loading mini van outside K-Mart: I hate mini vans, the only people that need mini vans are old people, white people, crackheads, and people who need 'em.
Chicago, Illinois
Overheard by: Rebecca
Guy on cell: If you're serious about jumping, you go to the Golden Gate Bridge. If you're really not, go to the Bay Bridge.
San Mateo, California
Overheard by: Technetium
Social worker talking to hobo: What can I get for you, sir?
Hobo: How about a 9 mm semi-automatic gun?
Social worker: Well, I can't do that, but do you need bus tickets? Where are you going?
Hobo: Hell.
Social worker: Okay, I'll get those bus tickets then.
Hobo: Your hair's much nicer than mine.
Hospital
Ontario
Canadia
Overheard by: yooo
Chick, seriously: Corn's one of them slow motherfuckers.
Friend, upset: Whores.
Aurora, Colorado
Overheard by: Leevee
Girl #1: My dream is to have a harem of guys that I can make dress up like the pale man from Pan's Labyrinth.
Girl #2: Why the hell would you do that?
Girl #1: Because it would be awesome and scary. I just want to see a bunch of people running away from me and my harem.
Mount Holyoke College
South Hadley, Massachusetts
Father to three-year-old daughter, after she took her shirt off: Just like your mother.
http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/310140762/i-want-to-hang-out-with-her-mother.html
Overheard by: is that how you met her?
Girl #1: Oh my god! You sounded so much like Katharine Hepburn just then!
Girl #2: I sounded like who?
Girl #1: Well, never mind, you stopped doing it. Bitch.
Couch Dorm
University of Oklahoma
Clerk: I love women. The only thing prettier than a woman is a deer.
Post Office
South Burlington, Vermont
Overheard by: Sweenan A. Mornstuy
Girl #1, playing Tetris: Stop moving your feet, it's distracting me.
Girl #2: I wasn't trying to distract you! I needed to crack my ankles.
Girl #1: I bet Hitler just needed to crack his ankles too, he didn't mean to kill all those Jews.
Calgary
Canadia
Overheard by: Estelle
Jock: Our soccer team's like the colon–it's probably there for a reason but no one knows what it is.
Friend: That's the appendix.
Westminster, Maryland
