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Mid-twenties guy leaving voice mail: Hey baby, just calling to say hi. How are your boobs?

http://eavesdropdc.blogspot.com/2008/06/just-fine-thanks-and-yours.html

Overheard by: brickskeller

Girl to boyfriend: I am the clownfish to your anenome.

Salt Lake City, Utah

Angry mother: Seriously, Landon, I told you, do not touch anyone else's balls!

Mini Golf
Burnham, Maine

Professor: So a nasal quality of voice would be–you all know who Fran Drescher is, right?
Emo kid: She hurts my soul.

Memorial University, St. John's
Newfoundland
Canadia

Overheard by: Mel

Hypnotist: Now you're riding really fast. You're going 80 miles an hour. 100 miles an hour. You're going 130 miles an hour! Oh no! That sounds like a police siren. You just got pulled over! Young man, what's your name?
Hypnotized kid: John*.
Hypnotist: John, do you know why I pulled you over?
Hypnotized kid: It's because I'm black, sir.

Navy Pier, Chicago

Girl, looking down her shirt: I can’t tell if that’s pork or a hickey.
Friend: You’re so awesome!

Bellingham, Washington

Overheard by: Muffler

College girl #1: So did I tell you I’m going on a celibacy kick this semester? To cleanse myself.
College girl #2: Oh, really?
College girl #1, picking up GQ magazine with Rachel Bilson on the cover: Ugh, I’ve lost all respect for her. She’s such a slut.

Melbourne
Australia

Overheard by: Lindsay

Black man, approaching black woman wrapped in garments with only her eyes visible: Salam Aleikum.
Woman: I'm not Muslim, muthafucka, I'm cold!

Harrisburg, Pennsylvania

Overheard by: Michael

Guy at library: What is this thing?
Friend: It's how you check out books from the library.
Guy, proudly: Oh, well, I've managed to get through my entire undergrad without ever using the library!

http://www.overheardatmcgill.com/archives/2008/11/20/he-must-be-in-education/

Overheard by: Jon

Excited lady, telling story to group of people: And then he turned the tap on right into my purse!

Seattle, Washington