30-something druggie girl: I know my dad's looking down at me, helping me and shit. That's how I got my handbag back.
30-something druggie guy: Yeah? For fuckin serious?
30-something druggie girl: Yeah! I feel like he's telling me shit sometimes. Sometimes I reckon he wants me to stop taking the pills and the smack, but then I'm like, “Nah, that's just the drugs talking.”
Train
Melbourne
Australia
Overheard by: XPIOTOS
Girl #1: Yuck! You dated him? Why?
Girl #2: Well, I thought he was cute, but it turns out he was really just rich.
Manuel Antonio
Costa Rica
Meth user: Am I too late to get my methadone?
Young pharmacist: Yes. After five p.m. we dump all the methadone down the drain.
Meth user, very nervous: Are you kidding?!
Young pharmacist, laughing: Yes, I am.
Fort Erie, Ontario
Canadia
Fat girl to thin girl pushing pram: Skinny men have skinny cocks.
England
Overheard by: Betsy
Teenage boy to girlfriend: You have the advantage, because you can use your boobs to carry things.
Charlestown Square
Newcastle
Australia
Overheard by: Callie
Little boy to mother: Is this where we have to strip?
Security Line
Newark Airport, New Jersey
Girl: So, my roommate’s mom still lets her use her credit card, which is crazy! I mean, we’re like 24, and I’ve had my own credit card since forever… But anyways, I guess my roommate had a huge bill last month, and her mom got all upset and called her and said, ‘Maybe you should soak the credit cards and put them in the freezer, so when you get the impulse to use them they’ll be frozen.’ So now we have, like, three credit cards in a tub in our freezer.
Brown Line El
Chicago, Illinois
Old man in pub garden: … Opened the door and there he was wiv' two whores and dressed in stockings. Fucking hell. Load of coke there too. Anyways, next morning…
Leamington Spa, England
Overheard by: Bleep
Professor: No, pondering eternal truths is not a good excuse for missing my class…I'd need a signed note from god.
Lycoming College
Williamsport, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: JQ
Girl #1 (pouring a cup of tea): Awww man, it's all the stuff from the bottom.
Girl #2: Oooh! After you drink it, give it to me and I'll read the tea leaves!
Girl #1: (hands the cup to girl #2)
Girl #2 (with a fake British accent): I see a hippogriff!
Guy: I did not just hear that.
Burlington, Vermont
Overheard by: Misaki
