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Plain Jane: Finish eating, so we can go outside!
Goth girl: Quit bossing me around! I just got out of line five minutes ago; it's not my fault that it's 12:45 and I've only eaten half of my lunch!
Popular boy to goth girl: I don't think I've ever heard you speak before.

School Cafeteria
El Paso, Texas

Bimbette in line for concert: Wait, like, when is New Year's Eve? Is it the 30th or the 31st?
Boyfriend: It's the 30th. New Year's Day is the 31st.

Chain Reaction
Anaheim, California

Overheard by: oldest person at the show

Girl #1, after seeing Sweeney Todd: Dude, is it bad that some of those people-pies looked good? I wonder what they would taste like…
Girl #2: That's awful!
Girl #1: Too bad. Those fuckers looked tasty.
Girl #3: I told you we should have eaten before we came here.

California

Overheard by: Kayleigh

Guy talking too loudly on cell phone: Honestly, if you took a dump and smeared it all over my chest, you know, in my face and all that, I?d be fine. Actually I might not, thats pretty extreme, but you know…

http://www.overheardatumbc.com

Girl on phone talking about going to a strip club for the first time: I mean, I really felt bad for those girls, they like, had to dance around topless!

Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

Overheard by: What did she think strippers did?

Captain on intercom: Ladies and gentlemen, just wanted to let you know the reason this flight was delayed. The plane collided with a bird upon landing. It's no big deal; it just hit a body part. The bird is okay.

Airport
Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania

Overheard by: Ladle (who is skeptical about the well-being of the bird)

Superior girl: You're just stumped by the Father-Christmas-isn't-a-cat argument.

Norwich
England

Overheard by: Inigo Montoya

Guy waiting in line for a ride: … And then I got a hip transplant… from a baboon…

Disneyland
Anaheim, California

Overheard by: Kimberly Disney

Loud woman to friend: So I said to her, “I gotta go. Linda's avocado is ripe and you know what that means.”

Portland, Maine

Overheard by: Taffy Doublewide

Old man: I sell rope to the government.

Shrewsbury
England

Overheard by: Matt