Spoiled nine-year-old: People only love me for my stuff.
Day Care
Wichita, Kansas
Overheard by: amused
Teacher: Okay, so the online quiz is up. You have a week to complete it, in your own time. I suggest, even encourage, you to bring your laptops and get together with your friends and have an “online quiz party”. Last year we had students throwing “online quiz orgies” but that's another story.
Griffith University
Australia
Psychology instructor: If you look at the castle in The Little Mermaid, you'll see there are some phallic subliminal messages…
Student in the back row: It's a giant penis castle!
Psychology Class, Northwestern University
Illinois
Bawling small girl in grocery store, after not getting what she asked: But, mom, I'm crying really hard!
Ingersoll Avenue
Des Moines, Iowa
Intercom: The store will be closing in 15 minutes. Please bring your purchases to the front of the store to the check-out line. We hope you enjoyed your shopping experience. Thank you for shopping at K-Mart… Shit, I mean “Wal-Mart.”
Wal-Mart
Massachusetts
Overheard by: Caitlin
Professor: People break laws all the time, like stop signs and oral sex.
http://www.overheardatumbc.com
Student: Do you want to know the ones I picked?
Prof: Well, if you want to share them… No.
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Tipsy guy to girl beside him: What are you doing later?
Girl: Going home to Scotchgard my bathrobe.
Duke & Duchess Bar
Ontario
Canadia
Overheard by: Cooper Street Relic
Girl #1, looking at picture: Oh my gosh! Look, the first aider is totally judging her. If I was passed out from crack, I would so not wanna be judged.
Girl #2: Oh, I know, totally!
Thailand
Guy #1: Dude, like my whole body hurts.
Guy #2: Well, I told you not to hang out with those girls.
Guy #1: Yeah, but I haven't dated a religion major in a long time.
Harvard University
Cambridge, Massachusetts
Overheard by: dave
