England

Academic-type Oxford guy: You have such silky hair.
American girl: Thanks…
Academic-type Oxford guy: You could weave a garment out of it!

Oxford
England

Overheard by: Catherine

Lecturer: If I’d given you gin instead of phonology, no doubt you’d all be sitting closer together.

Manchester University
UK

Overheard by: Ferdinand

Girl: I'm not sure if I can be bothered dying.

London
England

Student: So then I turned round and there was a snake in my bacon!

Birchwood Community High School
Warrington
England

Guy to friend: And then she said, “I am not even half the man she used to be.”

Oxford
England

Overheard by: Well, she WAS born in Germany

Woman talking on phone to friend: I have a real thing for little boys. I never used to…

Train Leaving Brighton
England

Overheard by: Wishing she hadn’t tuned in at that point

Middle-aged woman: What the fuck is ‘W-T-F’?

Exmouth, Devon
United Kingdom

Overheard by: Bernard

Girl to friend: So, how many skirts do you know that are made for the figure of a man?

Priestley College
Warrington
England

Overheard by: RuncornianAsh

Drunk guy: Yeah, well, you could spunk on her face, then lick your jizz off her dreadlocks.

Pub
Leamington Spa
England

Overheard by: Bleep

Dad: Later, we need to find grandma a boyfriend.
Seven-year-old son: Grandma already has a boyfriend, though.
Dad: Really? Who?
Seven-year-old son: She's married to granddad!
Dad: No, no, your other grandma.
Seven-year-old son: Oh yeah, she really needs a boyfriend.

Train
Manchester
England