Guy, aggressively: I’ll sparkle you!

The Eiffel Tower

Overheard by: Emily

California blonde: Ohmigod, I wonder what their waxing is like in France?
California brunette: I dunno… I once waxed it all off, though.
California blonde: Really? How? I've only waxed my bikini line.
California brunette: I'd just had three glasses of wine and one of those waxing pots, because my dad's a hairdresser.


Overheard by: Freedom Waxing!

British male, contemplating the last two teabags left in the chalet: We'd best save one in case of an emergency.


Girl looking at nude statues: Why is everyone so sexually displeased in this place?

The Louvre Museum

French metrosexual, holding up iPhone: It's from Madame Butterfly. You know it?
French bike cop: Yeah, I saw the American movie of it. With that one homosexual actor. Robbie… Robin…
British dinner guest: Robbie Williams?
American dinner guest: Robin Williams? Wait, he's not gay…
French bike cop: Yes. Him.
British dinner guest: That was Mrs Doubtfire.
American dinner guest: It's called Papillon in the US.
French metrosexual: What?


Irish rugby fan, to crowd of others: … So I said to him, ‘It’s just like eating out your sister’s pussy — tastes just as good, but it’s not quite right.’


Overheard by: kitkat …Scarred for Life

Little girl, in Arabic, as she sits in the train: Smells like cotton candy!
Mother, in French: Yeah, you're right, it smells like cotton candy. (to grandmother) Don't you think it smells like cotton candy?
Young black woman, sitting in the next row, smiling: It's me. It's my perfume.
Mother: Really?! What is it?
Young black woman: Vanilla and cotton candy.
Mother: Really? My girl told me it smells like the amusement park. At first I thought it was the cleaning product they used to wash the train floor. (pause) It smells really good.

C Train

Overheard by: BBM Tm

American woman to daughter, window shopping in front of Hermès: Luxury isn't for everyone.


American bimbo, standing in front of an Italian painting of a martyr bleeding from his leg: Uhh, why is he, like, bleeding from his penis?

The Louvre

Overheard by: American art student

Man coming out of Tibetan restaurant: But I saw the rabbit!
Woman: No, the rabbit is dead. I promise you, the rabbit is dead.

Boulevard de Magenta
Paris, France

Overheard by: Texpat