Friends

40-something woman: So now all my panties are gross and streched out.
Friend: What a jerk!

Macy's
Traverse City, Michigan

Overheard by: megansbaby

Girl to friends, walking through produce section: I have never felt so threatened by produce in all my life.

http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/407666795/how-do-you-think-the-banana-feels.html

Overheard by: laurel.

No Wonder King Cole Isn't a Merry Old Soul Anymore

Preppy college girl to friend: She was the girl who would go down on him while lighting his bowl. She was the perfect girl for him. It's too bad she went crazy, they would have been so happy together!

http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/411972898/yeah-she-sounds-irreplaceable.html

Overheard by: burrhead.

Girl #1: Oh my gosh, it was so awkward. I was so tired yesterday, I walked in my room and my roommate was totally having sex with a random guy.
Girl #2: Oh god, what did you do?
Girl #1: What do you mean? I took a nap.

American University
Washington, DC

Short-haired college girl to guy friend: So, is it okay if I fart in front of you?
Guy friend (pause): Well, you're gay, right? Then I guess it's okay.

http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/396734652/good-because-i-already-did.html

Overheard by: a. Lil.

Soccer girl: God, it's like Aristotle took a shit on you!
Friend: I know, right?

Memorial University
St. John's, Newfoundland
Canadia

Overheard by: Mel

Very large gross woman: So, I'm gonna need a serious douching when I get home.
Friend: It's Tuesday.

http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/389126149/so-many-questions-yet-i-want-none-of-the-answers.html

Overheard by: threw up in his mouth

American tourist: Where's north here?
Local Swedish friend: (points north)
American tourist: It seems north changes everywhere I go, in Hungary it was that way (points), in Aspen it was that way (points) and now in Sweden it's that way (points).
(Swede stares in disbelief)

Stockholm
Sweden

Hottie: But who do you cheat off of?
Friend: I read the book.

Geoge Brown College
Toronto, Ontario
Canadia

Overheard by: Tdot Girl

Overweight mom with toddler: Then he found out he was a hermaphrodite, a boy cursed with the body of a woman. He grew up never knowing…never knowing a thing.
Overweight friend: Wouldn't ya know?

Seattle's Best Coffee
Phoenix, Arizona

Overheard by: All You Can Eat