Friends

Jewish man: I am not sexist!
Jewish man’s friend: You are so sexist Archie Bunker is embarrassed.
Jewish man: I’m not sexist. I’ll stab a chick in her junk!

Israeli Martial Arts Class
Kansas City, Missouri

Overheard by: Ari

Girl #1: All they talked about was fannies… And tits… And… Fuckin’… Something else.
Girl #2: Rugby.
Girl #1: Yeah. Rugby.

Warwick
England

MIT frat boy #1: I’m just saying, everybody has a strip poker tournament during rush week. We need something different.
MIT frat boy #2: You mean, like, strip risk or battleship?
MIT frat boy #1: Um… Sure.

Chinese Restaurant
Boston, Massachusetts

Overheard by: Brian

Blonde #1: I saw a church sign the other day that said “Let Jesus be a part of your rainbow.” Isn’t that, like, gay?
Blonde #2: Maybe you’re supposed to think about Jesus when you’re having gay sex.
Blonde #1: Ohhh… I get it now.

Piscataway, New Jersey

Overheard by: …. I don’t think anyone gets it.

Sorority girl #1: I should, like, just wear mini skirts all the time.
Sorority girl #2: Why?
Sorority girl #1: I have great legs, they’re my best asset. [quiet pause] But I don’t like my personality.

Dressing Room at Buffalo Exchange
Austin, Texas

Overheard by: Yes! She just redeemed herself

Girl #1: It was cause and effect, he bit me on my hip.
Girl #2: So you slept with him?

Kalamazoo, Mississippi

Guy to friend: Dude, you just now figured out that The Beatles suck?

Public School
Las Vegas, Nevada

Woman to man: She said that if she leaves her husband, I can have the handcuffs.

UC Berkeley’s campus
Berkeley, California

Dude #1: Man, I got so drunk on Saturday.
Dude #2: Did you pee your pants again?
Dude #1: No. [Dude #2 stares at him.] … Yes.
Dude #2: What’s wrong with you?
Dude #1: I don’t know.

Lake View Terrace, California

Teen girl wearing a warm jacket: Hey, Kim.
Kim: [Wearing pretty much nothing.] Oooh, you look warm! Can I put my hand inside you?

Los Angeles, California