20-ish girl, reminiscing: Yeah, one year we deep-fried a turkey… But then the driveway caught on fire.
Friend, laughing: What?! How?!
20-ish girl, distressed: I don’t want to talk about it right now.
Seattle, Washington
Overheard by: Celessa Dietzel
20-ish girl, reminiscing: Yeah, one year we deep-fried a turkey… But then the driveway caught on fire.
Friend, laughing: What?! How?!
20-ish girl, distressed: I don’t want to talk about it right now.
Seattle, Washington
Overheard by: Celessa Dietzel
Friend #1: You’re not inhaling!
Smoking girl: Do I have to inhale?
Friend #1: Yeah. Otherwise you’re not really smoking.
Friend #2: You’re just getting mouth cancer.
Bryn Mawr College
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Club guy: You asked him if he has ever seen Dances with Wolves?
Club girl: Well, yeah. He’s Native American!
Club guy: That’s like asking a Jewish person if they have ever seen Fiddler on the Roof!
Ohio State University, High Street
Columbus, Ohio
Overheard by: Tuition Wasted
Guy: No, Derek* is definitely gay.
Girl #1: No, he’s not! He has naked pictures of girls all over his walls and MySpace and everything.
Girl #2: So? You know he only has those because he likes to paint chickens on them!
Seattle, Washington
Emo girl: Hey, when we get home we should totally creep up on my sister and scare her.
Emo guy: I’m not scaring your sister. I already made a bad first impression on her.
Emo girl: Don’t worry, she won’t care. Seriously.
Emo guy: Look, I’ll throw a fish at her, but I’m not scaring her, okay?
Emo girl: Okay.
610 bus to Nambour
Australia
Overheard by: Aidan
Guy: So, my Friday night was a little awkward.
Girl: How so?
Guy: Well, uh… I sort of… um… Made out with Lyndsey.
Girl: Lyndsey. As in, my ex-boyfriend’s little sister, Lyndsey?! I can’t believe this! What the hell is wrong with you?
Guy: Don’t hate me. It wouldn’t have happened if you were there to watch me! I blame you. Die.
Woodinville, Washington
Guy: So I told her, ‘Stop busting my chops.’
Chick: What does that mean?
Guy: What does what mean?
Chick: ‘Busting my chops.’
Guy: You never heard that before?
Chick: I think so, but I never knew what it meant.
Guy: It means, like, breaking someone’s balls.
Chick: [Silent stare.]Guy: You never broke someone’s balls?
Chick: I don’t think so.
Guy: Well, you’re breaking my balls right now.
Westbury Music Fair
Westbury, New York
Overheard by: Big Larry
Man: Where have you been all my life?
Woman: At the bowling alley!
Armor Road
North Kansas City, Missouri
Overheard by: Caesar22
