Woman: I orgasmed here once.
Friend, cheerfully: Oh, I've done that several times!
James Brown Arena
Augusta, Georgia
Overheard by: Annissa
Woman: I orgasmed here once.
Friend, cheerfully: Oh, I've done that several times!
James Brown Arena
Augusta, Georgia
Overheard by: Annissa
Irate woman, commenting on depiction of Jesus at the Sidewalk Art Festival: He was so fat I couldn't even focus on the fact he was supposed to be Jesus.
Savannah, Georgia
Seven-year-old: Mommy, why is that man going under the train?
40-something woman: Because, sweetie, he works there.
Seven-year-old: He works under the train?
40-something woman: Yes, sweetie.
Seven-year-old: When I get older I wanna work under a train.
40-something woman: Nice, maybe you can pay for my funeral. Not like your older brother…
Atlanta, Georgia
Overheard by: Malina
Grandmother: I had to write you out of my will.
10-year-old grandson: What? Why?
Grandmother: You never called. I can’t give you money and things if you never call.
10-year-old grandson: But I love you.
Grandmother: You can’t just say it! You have to mean it and show it! I’m keeping you out of the will!
Target
Atlanta, Georgia
iPod girl on cell: I'm eating lunch and listening to lesbian music. (pause) Yeah, The L Word soundtrack. I'm working on becoming a lesbian again. (laughs) I'm just kidding. I'm still gonna drive stick. (pause) That's what happens when you're a cock whore. You can't just give it up cold turkey.
Atlanta, Georgia
Female classics major: My advisers are all men, and the youngest is, like, 45. And my thesis is on desire. It’s like, I don’t know what a male orgasm feels like. I don’t even know what a female orgasm feels like!
Emory University
Atlanta, Georgia
BBW: You wouldn’t want to see me in pretzel-formation.
Skinny man: How would you know?
BBW: I mean it. You really wouldn’t want to see me in pretzel-formation. It’s not very pretty to watch. It gets stuck easily that way.
Atlanta, Georgia
Overheard by: Melissa
Art school hipster girl, in the middle of different conversation: Oh my god! I got my goddamned hair cut yesterday!
Art school hipster guy: I was gonna say in the car!
(art school hipster girl smiles with crazy eyes and mouth agape)
Art school hipster guy: No, seriously… It is so fresh.
Savannah, Georgia
Girl #1: I fucked in the ass last night for the first time.
Girl #2: Did it hurt?
Girl #1: Nope! But this morning when I shit it did! I think my hole got bigger!
Girl #2: That is sick!
Girl #1: You’re just jealous!
Girl #2: Maybe a little.
Augusta, Georgia
Old hillbilly: I love my old lady so much, I told her that when I die, I want her to cremate me, put me in a douche bag and give me one more go ’round…
Athens, Georgia
