Georgia

Male customer: Since you're new, I will order slowly. (proceeds to do so)
Cute female barista, after writing down: Okay, that wasn't so hard!
Male customer: Oh, I'll give you something hard… Oh, wait, did that come out wrong?

Roswell, Georgia

Girl: In case they forget our names, they’re right here on our vaginas.

1280 Peachtree Street
Atlanta, Georgia

Guy #1: Is your aunt gonna get a divorce?
Guy #2: Yeah.
Guy #1: Niiiice.

Walton High School
Marietta, Georgia

Overheard by: nezu!

Blonde 20-something #1: I feel awful.
Blonde 20-something #2: Yeah, I'm drinking a beer and then going to church.

Bagel Shop
Atlanta, Georgia

Guy to table of friends: I mean, what would you do if you saw a hippo putting on ChapStick?

Atlanta, Georgia

Overheard by: CJ

Woman to child: I'm not responsible for knowing where you are. It's not my job to watch you. You need to be responsible and know where I'm at.

Aquarium
Atlanta, Georgia

Overheard by: Really?

Pilot #1: He flew to Myrtle Beach to meet some girl he met online. We were expecting to find him naked in a bathtub full of ice missing a kidney.
Flight attendant: Who would want his kidney? He's so short!
Pilot #2: Hey, kids need kidneys too! Little kids!

Atlanta, Georgia

Chick: I got, like, suspended three times in five days.
Coworker: I only got suspended once, but that was just ’cause I cut this bitch with a razor.
Chick, to customer: Thank you, sir.

McDonald’s
Dunwoody, Georgia

Overheard by: blur

Hipster girl to guy: I got lucky. All I had to do was make out with him. (motions to other hipster girl standing beside them) She had to suck him off!

Atlanta, Georgia

Two-year-old boy, admiring his hands instead of the alligators: Look, Dad — look at my nails!
Grimacing father: Yes, yes… Your mother is to blame for that.

Atlanta Zoo
Georgia