And Swing by the Great Wall on the Way?

Traveler with heavy European accent: So, can we drive to the Grand Canyon one day? We'd really like to see it while in America.

Dulles Airport
Washington, DC

Posted on August 8, 2015
Airports & flights, Foreigners, Holidays, Offers and requests, Stupidity, Washington, DC

We’re Hoping She Stays Out of the Minibar

Blonde on cell: We got a nice hotel room for our cat.

Montgomery and California
San Francisco, California

Overheard by: Ladle

Posted on July 25, 2015
Animals, California, Default, Holidays, Idiots, On the phone, Stupidity, Weirdness, Women

Kept Gagging Into My Wide-open Mouth

Guy: So Jeff's cousin came out.
Girl: I knew he was gay! He's like, the only guy I didn't make out with on New Year's.
Guy: You totally made out with him!
Girl: Yeah, but he wasn't into it.

Ramat Aviv
Israel

Posted on July 21, 2015
Compare and contrast, Default, Europe, Family ties, Girls, Guys, Holidays, Sexuality

Thanksgiving's Not a Religious Holiday, but Whatever

Waitress: Are you going to celebrate Thanksgiving tonight?
Woman with thick Canadian accent: Oh, no, we're going to go home and worship Satan, if that's okay with you.

Cracker Barrel
Orlando, Florida

Posted on July 19, 2015
Baristas, Evil, Florida, Holidays, Religion, Weirdness, Women

Let’s Just Say Rudolph’s Girlfriend Has Her “Monthly Visitor”

Girl #1: Every time I watch Rudolph, it gives me stress.
Girl #2: That show is horrible!
Girl #1: See, those little reindeer, they didn’t know any better, but Dancer was a grown-ass reindeer! He knew better than to treat Rudolph like that, tellin’ his own kid not to play with Rudolph… That’s some straight-up bullshit.
Guy: And why was Rudolph’s nose red if both of his parents’ noses were black?
Girl #2: ‘Cause his mom was a ho.
Girl #1: Y’know, Dancer was probably his mom’s punk-ass baby-daddy. And you know what? Even Santa didn’t know how to act. If I was Rudolph, I would tell Santa, ‘Oh, hell no!’
Girl #2: Oh, hell no!
Girl #1: ‘Santa better get his fat ass up there and guide his own shit, after he be treatin’ me like that! Oh, hell no!’

http://www.overheardinpittsburgh.com/

Posted on June 30, 2015
Friends, Holidays, Overheard in Pittsburgh

I Left You a Box of Chocolates in a Locker at the Airport

Office grunt: Valentine’s Day lunch is for people who are having affairs. I’ve worked every Valentine’s Day. The nights are all couples, but the days are all people who say they’re coworkers but then grab each other’s legs under the table.

http://overheardlines.blogspot.com/2007/02/special-valentines-message-from-savvy.html

Overheard by: mk

Posted on June 25, 2015
Grumpies, Holidays, Overheard Lines

He's Got Bette Davis Thighs

Girl, about guy in Jason Vorhees mask coming on stage during Halloween skit: I always recognize James* by his thighs.

St. Peter's College
New Jersey

Posted on November 26, 2014
Body parts, Girls, Holidays, New Jersey, Pop culture

“Why'd You Come As Yourself,?” They Said

Old woman on bus: I have a skirt like that.
Young professional woman: Really?
Old woman: I can't wear it. I can't wear skirts that short. I'm too old.
Young professional: Oh.
Old woman: But it cost a lot, so I wore it as a halloween costume.
Young professional: Really.
Old woman: Everyone thought I was a hooker.

Portland, Oregon