Woman on cell waiting in line for lunch: Oh, to keep you in the loop, we are not getting pregnant any time soon. There is like no sperm. They said there were eight, but they were retarded.
Richmond, Virginia
Woman on cell waiting in line for lunch: Oh, to keep you in the loop, we are not getting pregnant any time soon. There is like no sperm. They said there were eight, but they were retarded.
Richmond, Virginia
Girl #1: My grandfather has won the Nobel Prize!
Girl #2: Really?
Girl #1: Yeah, he has one of those trophies in his bookshelf!
Janitor, walking in: Are you sure it was the Nobel Prize?
Girl #1: Yes, I am! Don't you believe me? I'm gonna call him and ask! (proceeds to call, hangs up sounding disappointed)
Janitor: Well?
Girl #1: Oh, it was not the Nobel Prize. It was only from a bicycle race.
High School
Sweden
Overheard by: Malin
Cashier on cell phone: I mean… What’s the problem? Ejaculating? Is he ejaculating too much or too little? Which is the problem?
Shoprite
New Jersey
Overheard by: allison
Scruffy ponytail dude on cell: Is the dog oozing or pulsing? Tell your brother to stop squeezing the guinea pig, I can hear it squealing! (pause) Yes I can! Yes I can, Ruth*! (pause) Oh, sorry, I guess grandma sneezing does sound like the guinea pig… Just wrap the dog in a towel and I'll be home in an hour.
Tampa, Florida
Guy on cell: I would be walking, and suddenly the word “vaginas” with a massive smiley face beside would pop into my head, as if my brain was trying to tell me it's fun… like a children's book.
Winnipeg
Canadia
Overheard by: Chad
Middle aged man on phone: Maraud my castle?
Bath
England
Overheard by: Clara Lee
Girl on cell: I would've loved to have gone to that socks summit. It sounds amazing!
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Me, too?
Woman on cell: I just asked how’s he doing and he actually told me that he’s getting hard just talking to me. [Pause.] Well, what do you think I would say? “Oh ,that’s nice”!? Hell no! I said: “Oh crap! Sorry, I have another call, gotta go”. Yeah, that was definitely odd. Remind me never to be nice and try calling my exes again.
Florida
Girl on cell: Well, I don’t care if they kill fucking humans; just don’t fucking kill the worms!
http://overheardatcornell.blogspot.com/2006/10/long-overdue-update-part-2.html
Overheard by: hearstoomuch
