Teenage Boys Live in Fear That Gayness Will Stage a Surprise Attack

Boy holding slinky: I feel weird.
Boy holding other end: It's okay. We've got a slinky!

High School
Eugene, Oregon

Posted on November 26, 2022
Feelings, Guys, Oregon, School [Elem., Middle, & High], Sexuality, Toys

Oh, What's the Big Deal About Cunnilingus??

Guy jogging around track with friends: Well, if it's still alive we can't eat it, can we?

Robbinsville High School
New Jersey

Posted on November 10, 2022
Food, Friends, Guys, New Jersey, Questions, School [Elem., Middle, & High]

If You Know What I Mean

Girl to friend: I gave my ostrich a fur coat.

Rich Catholic Girls School
St. Louis, Missouri

Overheard by: Sarah

Posted on October 25, 2022
Default, Euphemisms, Girls, Hair, Missouri, School [Elem., Middle, & High], Vagina

Thankfully the Stupid Seem to Always Die Off First

Environmental science teacher: What, in your opinion, is the most pressing environmental issue our planet faces today?
Clueless redhead, raising hand unsurely: Is it… The birds?
Environmental science teacher: Excuse me?
Clueless redhead: Isn't there something up with birds? Like, aren't they dying or something?
Environmental science teacher: Um… Thousands of different animals are dying…
Clueless redhead: Oh. I thought it was just birds.

High School
Los Angeles, California

Posted on October 4, 2022
Animals, Birds, California, Compare and contrast, Death & dying, Questions, School [Elem., Middle, & High], Students, Stupidity, Teachers

Then Do the Romantic Thing and Sell It on the Internet

Ditzy teen girl to ditzy friend: Oh my god! I would never be able to live with myself if I died before I lost my virginity!

High School
Springwood
Australia

Posted on September 21, 2022
Australia, Death & dying, Girls, School [Elem., Middle, & High], Stupidity, Virginity

In His Electronic Sepulchre There by the Sea

Girl discussing Edgar Allan Poe's The Oval Portrait: It's just that it seems like he went through and for each word looked in the dictionary for the longest synonym. Or, well, did he use those words back then?

Baltimore School for the Arts
Baltimore, Maryland

Posted on August 23, 2022
Default, Girls, Maryland, Questions, School [Elem., Middle, & High], Students, Stupidity, Words

I'm Saving Those for the Yearbook

Ambiguous boy, yelling to friend across hall: And no pictures of me without pants!

High School
Nashville, Tennessee

Posted on July 27, 2022
Clothes, Friends, Queers, School [Elem., Middle, & High], Tennessee, Undies

What the Hell Is Going On in That Gym Class?

High school student #1: My finger hurts.
High school student #2 (absent mindedly): Yeah, my ass hurts too.

Prishtina
Kosovo

Overheard by: Curly

Posted on June 21, 2022
Default, School [Elem., Middle, & High], Sensory experiences, Students, Weirdness

It Makes Up for My Lack Of Boobs.

Short Asian chick to tall white guy: Oh my gawd, I've got it! So, heat rises, right? So it's probably all warm up there where you are, and down here with the normal people it's cold, and that's why you don't think it's cold, even though it's freaking freezing! Gawd, I love being an Asian! I come up with the most genius shit!

Muirlands Middle School
La Jolla, California

Posted on May 19, 2022
Asians, California, Default, Feelings, Girls, Questions, School [Elem., Middle, & High], Weather

Squidward Moved to Utah for Religious Reasons

Girl to guy wearing alien-hand gloves: What the hell are those?
Guy: They're my testicles… No! My… My… Test–test… The things that octopuses have!
Girl: Tentacles?
Guy: Yes! Tentacles…

High School
Utah

Overheard by: Weskimo

Posted on April 5, 2022
Animals, Balls, Girls, Guys, School [Elem., Middle, & High], Stupidity, Utah, Words

School [Elem., Middle, & High]

Squidward Moved to Utah for Religious Reasons