Loud girl: And my mother said to me, “Well, I guess you're an adult now, since you have adult sex.” And I was like, “What the fuck is that supposed to mean?” and she was like, “I opened your cupboard.” and I was thinking, “Oh shit!” because I've got a lot of shit in there. I've got porn, I've got a vibrator, a cock ring. I've got things she doesn't even know what to call them!
University of Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Alex Remnick
Hipster guy: I can't tell if I'm horny or it's just my sinus infection again…
UBC
Canadia
Girl #1: I'm having the worst day today.
Girl #2: Yeah, it's a good thing I had sex yesterday. Otherwise, today would just be hell.
Seattle, Washington
Little boy: How 'bout you get naked, and I get naked, and then we give naked hugs!
St. Joseph, Michigan
20-something girl: Do you remember that guy last night?
Friend: Oh, him? Yeah, I think he motor-boated me.
Canisius College
Buffalo, New York
Gay son: I need a sugar daddy.
Mother: You and me both.
Gay son: But I have a booty.
Mother, after long pause, and looking out the window: I have weeds where I once had grass…
Murrieta, California
Overheard by: I hope I don't become my mother
Tech enthusiast: Wait, did you say ‘cyber sex’?
Dude: No — cyborg sex.
Tech enthusiast: Cyborg sex? That’s even better!
http://weirdosofwinnipeg.blogspot.com/2007/03/resistance-is-futile.html
Guy #1: Man, I've tried everything. I don't know what to do.
Guy #2: Have you tried sex?
Guy #1: Actually, no…
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Thesis advisor to uncomfortable-looking advisees: You girls might be too young for it, but if you ever have the chance to have sex on a water bed, you should do it.
Colgate University
Madison County, New York
Girl: It's like, you're just doing whatever, and suddenly you're in the middle of an orgy, you know?
Friend: Yeah, I totally know.
Memorial University, St. John's
Newfoundland, Canadia
Overheard by: Clearly doing
