Female student: I came home last night and found my roommate sitting on the kitchen floor, crying and holding a bottle of Jägermeister and a recipe for homemade enchiladas.
Dumb friend: I didn't know you made enchiladas with Jägermeister.
University of Colorado, Boulder
College freshman girl: Wait… wait… Dinosaurs and vaginas!? (pause) Oh, now I get it!
Olympia, Washington
Overheard by: prefers dinosaurs
High school government teacher: Which country has the most negative image?
Student, enthusiastically: Africa!
Virginia Beach, Virginia
Senior girl #1: Ugh! I feel like I've seen Katie's vagina way to many times.
Senior girl #2: Everyone has seen Katie's vagina. I don't know if you can graduate if you haven't.
Colorado
Overheard by: will be graduating…
Biology professor, a month into school: You have an exam next Monday… I mean Tuesday. Next Tuesday. (chuckle) You don't have this class on Mondays.
Really blonde girl in the back: Wait! We don't?!
Blinn College
Brenham, Texas
Overheard by: Face Palm
High school girl: There was way too much drama in sixth grade. All my friends were always talking about how their boyfriends knocked someone up. I'm like, “you're twelve years old! Get over it!”
Greenbelt, Maryland
Instructor, during wine tasting: So swirl the glass and tell me what you smell.
Student: It smells like oak?
Instructor: Yeah! I'm definitely getting wood from this.
Denver, Colorado
Overheard by: me too
Girl to teacher, about Underground Railroad: Wait… didn't the white people hear the train go by?
High School
Clark, New Jersey
Overheard by: Sweeney
5th grade girl: And he says to me, “you are so stupid,” and I say to him, “you are more stupid than me.” Then he says “nuh-uh, you more stupider than anybody.” And I'm said, “whatever, stupid!”
Tennessee
Overheard by: beth
Teacher, pointing to female student: You have ovaries. (pointing to self) I have testes.
High School Classroom
Englewood, Colorado
