Drunk guy: I'm so happy I'm a guy. I don't have to wipe after I pee.
Tipsy girl: You should really wipe if you want Lisa* to suck your dick.
Bayonne, New Jersey
Drunk guy: I'm so happy I'm a guy. I don't have to wipe after I pee.
Tipsy girl: You should really wipe if you want Lisa* to suck your dick.
Bayonne, New Jersey
American girl: Are you British?
Irish girl: No, I'm Irish.
American girl: Ew! Does that mean you eat haggis?
Irish girl, peevishly: No, haggis is Scottish.
American girl: Ohhh! Sorry, I didn't mean to offend you!
Irish girl: The implication that I'm Scottish isn't what offends me about this conversation.
Los Angeles, California
Overheard by: T
Aunt: Jared*, put the toy back. We are going to go over to K-Mart, because they have a better selection.
Four-year-old: I don't want to go to K-Mart, auntie! There's too many white people over there!
Ocean City, Maryland
Overheard by: His (embarassed) Mother
Freshman #1, reading from textbook: Butte. What is a butte exactly?
Freshman #2: A fancy way to say “butt.”
Freshman #1: God, you learn so much at college.
http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/353858064/not-enough.html
Overheard by: kbay
30-something: This is my first time sitting at a table!
North Adams, Massachusetts
Overheard by: little miss spy
Boyfriend to girlfriend: Yeah, I'd throw a snowball at the Princess of Sweden. Knock that tiara right off her fucking head.
Girlfriend: Totally. You'd be like, “who's Princess now, bitch?”
Vancouver
Canadia
Psych class guy: Dolphins are the second smartest animal.
Psych class girl: What's the smartest?
Psych class guy: Humans.
Psych class girl: Wait, humans are animals?
Psych class guy: Yep.
Psych class girl: Really?
Psych class guy: For real.
Hamilton
Canadia
Overheard by: Jayme
Teenage girl with bad haircut: Ugh, I so just want to punch Lauren* in the face… She's lucky I'm not a bitch.
Overweight teenage boy: I know!
Teenage girl with bad haircut: I mean, seriously, all the time from here it's all “blah blah blah, I got raped.” So annoying!
Overweight teenage boy: I know!
Teenage girl with bad haircut: I'd understand if it was once in a while… but dude, she talks about it all the time!
Edmonton
Alberta
Canadia
Overheard by: Lisa
Frathole: The thing about being Jewish is that you don't have to believe in god.
UMass
Massachusetts
Overheard by: So proud of my degree
