If Not, I Don't Think You're Ready for This Sorority

Girl at dining hall: I mean: haven't you ever smelled your own bellybutton?

Lehigh Universuty
Bethlehem, Pennsylvania

Posted on December 10, 2018
Body parts, Colleges & Universities, Girls, Pennsylvania, Questions, Sensory experiences

We’ve Lived a Lifetime in This One Elevator Ride

Professionally dressed Asian girl (in a low voice): I can’t believe you showed that girl your pubes, man!
Short, pudgy Asian guy (in a low indignant voice): Well *I* can’t believe you showed her your innie nipple!

Elevator, Montgomery Street
San Francisco, California

Overheard by: McNasty

Posted on November 13, 2018
Asians, Body parts, Compare and contrast, Default, Girls, Guys, Nipples, San Francisco

Think They'll Let Us Go Back and Look for Your Ass, or What?

Black lady #1, after riding Superman: Did you sit on them tree sides?
Black lady #2: No, I didn't.
Black lady #1: You should've! You could see them motherfuckin' trees! And I was like “what the fuck!” I mean, I was cussing my ass off!
Black lady #2: So that was you?

St. Louis, Missouri

Overheard by: Emma

Posted on October 18, 2018
Black people, Body parts, Gripes, Missouri, Sensory experiences

I Need My Face for Other Things

Flamboyant grad student, on ice skating: I went years ago… and fell flat on my face. Then I decided that I was too important for this!

Oxford
England

Posted on October 12, 2018
Body parts, Bragging, Compare and contrast, England, Leisure, Pride, Students

When I Think About Seeing You, I Touch My Eyes

Lady standing in bathroom, giving advice: Hey, you can get STDs from public bathrooms! Don't touch your eyes!

Washington, DC

Overheard by: pretty sure that's not how you get STDs

Posted on October 1, 2018
Body parts, Crazies, Health & Hygiene, STDs, Washington, DC

Does It Make My Breasts Look Phoney?

Teen girl: Hey! This lip gloss matches my nipples! And my phone.

Galleria Mall
Las Vegas, Nevada

Overheard by: Jo

Posted on July 19, 2018
Body parts, Cell phones, Compare and contrast, Default, Girls, Malls, Nevada, Nipples, Teens

…Here Comes Another One

Teen girl: This skirt is so short! My legs are freezing!
Teen boy: Mine are fine.
Teen girl: That's because of your intense orgasms.
Teen boy: True.

Starbucks
Burlington, Vermont

Overheard by: Sweenan A. Mornstuy

Posted on July 9, 2018
Bars & Clubs, Body parts, Clothes, Clothing, Compare and contrast, Orgasm, Teens, Vermont

Eating Dirt Is Also Off-Limits

Girl #1, talking about Lasik surgery: Well, they either cut your eye completely with a laser, or they do part of it surgically.
Girl #2: No! No! Stop. I can't talk about eyes. Don't talk about eyes, especially when I'm eating.
Guy: This is just like with my friend, Marise. We can't talk about killing people because she's from Haiti.

Arlington, Virginia

Overheard by: Molly

Posted on July 6, 2018
Body parts, Compare and contrast, Default, Food, Geography, Girls, Guys, Violence, Virginia

Every Time She Tips Forward, I'm Right There to Catch Her

College boy #1: Well dude, is she hot?
College boy #2: She's like my best friend, dude, but you'll probably think she's hot. I mean she's got huge tits, but she's my best friend.

Winona State University
Winona, Minnesota

Posted on July 2, 2018
Body parts, Colleges & Universities, Compare and contrast, Default, Guys, Minnesota, Questions, Students

Unlike Yours, Stomachface.

Taller Asian teen: Ha ha! You're so short! Shorty!
Shorter Asian teen: (silence)
Taller Asian teen: Sorry, I was just kidding.
Shorter Asian teen, sadly: Well, it's only because my shoulders are below my head…

China

Posted on May 25, 2018
Asians, Beauty, Body parts, China, Comebacks

Body parts