A Good Cargo Pocket Comes in Handy for Almost Anything

Police officer: So that's when they started pulling baseball bats out of their pants?
Guy: Yeah, baseball bats and machetes!

Tysons Corner
Fairfax County, Virginia

Overheard by: Jack

Posted on August 23, 2008
Clothes, Cops, Default, Guys, Questions, Virginia, Weirdness

Why Parachute Pants Are Making a Comeback

Girl: I will pull my pants up and show you I am not hairy!

University of Maryland
College Park, Maryland

Posted on August 21, 2008
Clothes, Colleges & Universities, Default, Girls, Hair, Maryland

It'll Give Her a Break from the Monotony of Fucking Me

Guy #1: What are you going to get your girlfriend for her birthday?
Guy #2: I got her this sweater she wanted. But I'm also going to get her a dildo in case she doesn't like the sweater. That way she can go fuck herself.

Roosevelt Field Mall
Long Island, New York

Posted on August 10, 2008
Clothes, Default, Gifts, Guys, Malls, Masturbation, New York, Questions

Much Like Right Said Fred

Two-year-old boy: I'm too sexy for my shirt, too sexy for my shirt! So sexy!
Eight-year-old brother: He doesn't know what it means, he just does it for attention.

Canadia

Overheard by: Amused Babysitter

Posted on August 2, 2008
Canadia, Clothes, Default, Kids, Music, Siblings, Words

Unless Those Were Giant Clogged Arteries?

Lady #1: Did you notice how sheer her skirt was? A woman that size should think about what she wears.
Lady #2: I could see her moles.

Theatre
Brisbane
Australia

Posted on August 2, 2008
Australia, Body parts, Clothes, Default, Gossip, Insults, Women

I'll Bet You Say That to All the Girls

(outside of a coffee shop downtown late at night)
Hipster chick: So then I went to the store and found out the shoes were discontinued but…
Creepy guy (with unzipped and unbuttoned pants): What are you guys talking about? Can I talk or are you going to kick me out?
Hipster chick: Uh… (looks around for a quick exit) No man, you can stay. We're talking about shoes.
Creepy guy: You're so hot. No, really. I would kiss you like you'd never think about shoes again.

Akron, Ohio

Overheard by: Julia M

Posted on July 29, 2008
Clothes, Compliments, Creepsters, Default, Etiquette, Hipsters, K-I-S-S-I-N-G, Kink, Ohio, Strangers, Weirdness

Which Fortunately Has My Name on the Label

Professor: I make no sense to myself, I’m surprised I know my own name. Why? Because life sucks. But I have a nice jacket!

Christopher Newport University
Newport News, Virginia

Posted on July 27, 2008
Clothes, Colleges & Universities, Default, Gossip, Philosophy, Teachers, Virginia

Compounded by My Inability to Tell Hot from Cold, It’s a Logistical Nightmare

Guy: Leggings are fucking up everything. I used to know when it was winter because girls would stop wearing skirts, but now thanks to leggings they can wear them all year. It’s bullshit.

Connecticut College