Large man: You need a back rub?
Girl rubbing shoulder in pain: I’m fine, thanks.
Large man: I give great massages. My mama says it’s better than a orgasm.
MUNI bus
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: melissa
Large man: You need a back rub?
Girl rubbing shoulder in pain: I’m fine, thanks.
Large man: I give great massages. My mama says it’s better than a orgasm.
MUNI bus
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: melissa
Bathroom-bound tech woman: Are you following me? Not that many people follow me at my age.
Tech guy: No. I’m more of the ‘call-is-coming-from-inside-the-house’ kind of guy.
http://overheardinphilly.blogspot.com/
Overheard by: 2catchapredator
Biology professor, on earthworm digestive systems: And I’m including this part because I enjoy saying words like “anus”.
South Dakota State University
South Dakota
Eccentric driver's ed student: Sometimes I really just like to sniff my pants. (leans forward and sniffs his pants)
Northport, New York
Overheard by: Jessica
Man: She’s my soul mate. I just wish she was 20 years older and not my daughter.
http://www.overheardinminneapolis.com/2007/04/sir_youre_under_arrest.html
Overheard by: that’s kinda creepy
Bartender: So, what do you do?
Girl: I work at the morgue dissecting babies. Y’know, cutting them to get skin samples.
Bartender: Really?
Girl: Yeah. We call it ‘the baby grinder.’
Bartender: That’s disgusting.
Girl: What’s really gross is every time I do it I get really hungry.
Bar
Fitzroy
Australia
Hot burner chick: Our bar was busy until the fat naked guy showed up and scared everyone off!
Fat naked guy: I'm wearing Uggs!
Burning Man
Nevada
Overheard by: Eavesdropper
Guy, walking on the sidewalk under row of windows: So, on the subject of vaginas…
Portland, Oregon
Man #1: She’s lost a lot of weight recently.
Man #2: I guess. Didn’t help, though.
Man #1: With what?
Man #2: The pure funk which likely seeps from her gaping maw of an over-used pussy. I wouldn’t fuck that with your dick, dude.
Man #1: Thanks for having my back. Do me another favor — fuck your wife with my dick, okay?
Man #2: Why not? Someone’s dick should be allowed to.
9th and J Streets
Sacramento, California
Sorostitute #1: Oooh, a Southern boy!
Sorostitute #2: Yeah, it’s just something about that Southern genitalia that makes him so sexy. Wait, ‘genitalia’? Is that the right word? Well, you know — that smooth Southern thing.
James Madison University
Harrisonburg, Virginia
