Humanities prof: Where were we? (pause) Dead babies!
Murray State University
Kentucky
Humanities prof: Where were we? (pause) Dead babies!
Murray State University
Kentucky
20-something man on cell: I've got women. I started my own religion. I don't give a shit if hipsters don't think I'm cool. (pause) I know in my heart I'm a fucking genius. If I died tonight, there would be a massive white trash orgasm. (pause) If you're so bad, your soul goes into a wax museum. We should make our own rap music. We'll be so good they'll put us in a mausoleum, like Stalin.
Norman, Oklahoma
Mom: Oh, no… A dead chipmunk.
Small child: Yay! A dead chipmunk!
Morgantown, West Virginia
Young girl, about dragonfly on water slide: It can't be alive because it's dead!
College guy: Kids are so philosophical.
Hackettstown, New Jersey
High school senior girl #1: Where's Meg*?
High school senior girl #2: Getting her wisdom teeth out.
High school senior girl #1: Don't some people die from that?
High school senior girl #2: Maybe she will die.
High school senior girl #1: You'd like that, wouldn't you?
New Jersey
Philosophy student #1, about biomedical ethics: Yeah, we just don't know enough yet to go around screwing with genetic manipulation. Like, cloning people. That creeps me out.
Philosophy student #2: That sheep they cloned, Dolly. She died recently, didn't she? She was like five or six years old.
Philosophy student #1: Yeah. I don't think she lived very long.
Philosophy student #2: What's an average sheep lifespan?
Philosophy student #1, in defensive tone of voice: I don't know! I don't care about sheep!
Vancouver
Canadia
Student: Is it okay to wear leather trousers to a funeral?
Hull University
Hull
England
Sane-looking girl: Okay, so let's say that your boyfriend died a while back, right? Then he comes back as a zombie, like a real walking corpse. But he doesn't want to eat your brains or anything, he just wants to graduate high school and be your boyfriend again so he can go to prom with you. So, do you take him back?
Boy: Um… Has this actually happened to you?
High School Cafeteria
West Virginia
Student in library: Could you forget that Jesus died for your sins for like five minutes?
Smith College
Northampton, Massachusetts
Elderly woman to friends: Oh, she's lovely, she even offered to sleep in the coffin!
Cambridge
England
