NASA intern guy #1: I think your fish are gay… Like, 99 percent sure. Look, they’ve got vertical bars.
NASA intern guy #2: They so want each other.
NASA intern guy #1: They do. And it’s not unrequited. Look, they both have vertical bars!
NASA Ames Research Center
Silicon Valley, California
Girlfriend, holding up scrapbook thing: Do you like this?
Boyfriend: Yeah, it's nice.
Girlfriend: “It's nice,” because it's nice, or “it's nice,” so we can get the fuck out of here?
JoAnn Fabrics and Crafts
Tacoma, Washington
Overheard by: baker98391
Girl #1: You know it really makes me sad that after all this time you still don't appreciate my art.
Girl #2: That isn't art, you found it in your underwear!
Amarillo, Texas
Strange curly-haired girl: Make sure you make Edmund really hot.
Morose pale dark-haired girl: Why?
Strange curly-haired girl: Dude! Did you not read King Lear? Bitches were all over his dick!
Toronto
Canadia
Overheard by: Anneliese
Tayal tribesman bus driver: Sir, do you want to get off at this stop?
Old man: Yes, I want off at this stop, I am going to the dentist's.
Bus driver: What's wrong?
Old man: I have to have a tooth pulled. Can you believe that? I'm 82 but I still have to have a tooth pulled.
Bus driver: If you're going to have one pulled, you may as well have a bunch taken out.
Old man: That won't do, false teeth are expensive.
Bus driver: Then have boar tusks put in.
Old man: Boar tusks?
Bus driver (very earnestly): Yes, you can have two tusks put in on the lower jaw, and when they grow, they'll look great! (uses his fingers to demonstrate how the tusks would look growing out of his mouth)
Old man (laughing): It would take a long time for them to grow.
Bus driver: Not long! You're an old boar, but I'm just a young boar, so yours would grow much faster than mine!
(old man gets off bus laughing cheerfully)
http://talovich.blogspot.com/2008_08_01_archive.html#4067720002953022860
Overheard by: Yugan Dali
College student: I really just wanted to reach out and touch that lady's bunny.
Wellington, New Zealand
Drunk guy: Oh my god! Everyone in this room is so ugly!
Irish Pub
Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Jackie
Sorority girls playing drinking game in bedroom floor: Sarah! Drink!
Sarah: Hold on, I need to undo my pants!
Sorority House
Oxford, Mississippi
Overheard by: bootay
Professor: I have three children: 15, 13, and 7.
Female student: Oh, I don't think I could have three.
Male student: Yeah, with two you can do person-on-person defense, but with three you need zone.
professor: You have a point.
http://eavesdropdc.blogspot.com/2007/08/just-reminder-that-football-season.html
Overheard by: Ian
