Mr. Hon, hanging on car door: Hon! Tell mom here exactly where that swingers' club is, that I took you to on your birthday.
(wife says something unintelligible as she walks down path towards car)
Mom, sitting in car: Oh! That's where I used to buy ice cream when I was a little kid!
Public Pond
Kettering, Ohio
Girlfriend to boyfriend: We never have serious conversations anymore. It's upsetting.
Boyfriend's friend sitting with them: Well, that doesn't seem to matter, you've been fucking him since first year.
University of Virginia
Smokin' hot Filipina girlfriend: My friend said that I should use Photoshop and imagination to do this. I have Photoshop, but where can I get imagination? I've never heard of it.
White boyfriend: You're kidding me, right?
Smokin' hot Filipina girlfriend: What?
White boyfriend: There is no software called “imagination.” Just use your imagination. Duh!
Smokin' hot Filipina girlfriend: You're so not getting a blowjob tonight.
Toronto
Canadia
Overheard by: The white boyfriend
Girl to friends: I thought I was playing hard to get, but it turns out I was playing “I hate you”.
Elon University
Elon, North Carolina
Woman waiting for coffee: You know my sister is a Playboy model?
Friend: (blank stare)
Woman waiting for coffee: Yeah! She sends me the pictures. I mean, she's beautiful, but I don't wanna see that. And my brother, he looks at those!
Friend: (blank stare)
http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/455563420/all-in-the-family.html
Overheard by: next in line.
Irate mother: No, you don't understand. I need to board that plane now!
Stewardess at gate: Ma'm, you cannot board now. There is no airplane at the end of the jetway. Look–no plane out there.
http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/473032304/i-bet-a-lot-of-people-dont-understand-that-woman.html
Overheard by: delayed flights always make me irrational too
20-something brunette: I mean, what else are you supposed to do when someone shits their pants…drink more vodka!
Minneapolis, Minnesota
Overheard by: Chaser
Artsy emo: It was like lesbian Fight Club! First Leema liked Holly, then she liked Tracy, who liked Nicola, who also liked Holly. So Nicola and Leema got in a fist fight and in the end, Tracy and Holly had sex in the woodshop classroom!
Toronto
Canadia
Guy on cell: And I wanted to say, essentially, “Bitch, my office manages eight billion a year, so shut the fuck up”–but in the refined and enlightened way one would say such a thing in the country club dining room.
Santa Rosa, California
Overheard by: Rose Fox
Guy: Sometimes I feel like I want to get a steady girlfriend again.
Friend: Whenever I feel like that I just jerk off all over myself and the feeling goes away.
Downtown Post Office
Worcester, Massachusetts
