I Think It Was the Makeup Sex

Grad student: How did you crack your rib? That's awful.
Administrative assistant: My husband.

University of Delaware
Newark, Delaware

Overheard by: Lisa

Posted on March 17, 2020
Body parts, Colleges & Universities, Default, Delaware, Employees, Questions, Relationships, Students

Hey, You Try to Negotiate the Aisles While Applying Eyeliner

Female flight attendant (managing to bump beverage cart into a seat): Whoops, sorry! Woman driver!

Flight over Honolulu, Hawaii

Overheard by: Gaby Young

Posted on March 16, 2020
Default, Etiquette, Flight attendants, Gender issues, Hawaii, Women

“My Hatred for Teaching Is Vast As the Ocean”

English teacher: Can anyone tell me what the definition of a simile is?
Student: Like your ass…
English teacher: What did you say!?
Student: Like or as?
English teacher: Oh…yeah.

St. Joesph High School
New Jersey

Overheard by: Davel

Posted on March 14, 2020
Compare and contrast, Default, Education, Insults, New Jersey, Questions, Students, Teachers, Words

Dude, Just Make an Audio-Visual Geek Your Friend

Music history professor, putting a CD in the player: And now we pray to the god of CDs. It’s not good to be a teacher with CDs. They are very stupid things. [Pause.] …It’s not good to be a teacher, perhaps that’s what it is.

Peabody Conservatory
Baltimore, Maryland

Posted on March 14, 2020
Class, Default, Education, Feelings, God, Gripes, Jobs & Careers, Maryland, Music, Teachers, Technology

Speaking Of Guys Who Fuck Other People…

Guy: Let's get married!
Girl: Okay! When are you free?
Guy: Um, is it okay if we wait til after college so I can get a job and make money first?
Girl: Sure! You can fuck other people if you want to!
Guy: Uh, really…
Girl: Oh look, there's my boyfriend! (runs off)

Saint Peter's College
New Jersey

Overheard by: Erica

Posted on March 13, 2020
Default

I'm Afraid Library Regulations Dictate That I Must Give You a Wedgie

Librarian: Watcha doin'?
High school girl: Studying.
Librarian: Nerd.

Bellingham, Washington

Posted on March 12, 2020
Default, Education, Employees, Girls, Questions, Students, Washington, Words

This Reads Like a Seinfeld Line

College student: Everything in life can be related back to Seinfeld. It's like the bible, except it won't fail you.

Hookah Bar
Washington, DC

Posted on March 11, 2020
Bars & Clubs, Christianity, Compare and contrast, Default, Students, TV shows, Washington, DC

They Are Currently in Place

Well-dressed man to female companion, in crowded tasting room: Did you remember the dildo?
Elegant lady companion: Yes, I brought both of them.

Napa Valley wine Auction
St. Helena, California

Posted on March 10, 2020
California, Couples, Default, Etiquette, Guys, Offers and requests, Questions, Relationships, Suits, Toys, Women

It's Cute How You Think You Won't Be Working Weekends

20-something: When I get a big-girl job, I'm going to go on weekend vacations all over the world… in this country.

International Airport
Cleveland, Ohio

Posted on March 7, 2020
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Are There No Gay Cougars?

Fratty-looking queer #1: I need some lip balm. My lips feel all dried up, like…old fruit.
Fratty looking queer #2: You are an old fruit. (pause) No, really, you're 25, which means you're almost 30, which means you're almost dead.

Boston, Massachusetts

Overheard by: gymbo

Posted on March 7, 2020
Age and ageing, Body parts, Death & dying, Default, Feelings, Fruit, Massachusetts, Queers

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